From Strange To Weird ©

Is it me or is it society that has weirded out?
The other day D2 turned nineteen which means she’s officially an adult and I can now beat her and not get charged for child abuse.

She was telling me about her new boyfriends set up at their house.
He lives in his mother’s basement while she lives upstairs with her EX boyfriend.
Now, I don’t know about you people but why would anyone want to live with their EX?
I mean, if the relationship failed for any reason, you broke up because you don’t want to be together any more.

So I was sitting with D1 who rolled into town to help usher her sister into adulthood by taking her out for her first LEGAL drink.
That’s a milestone for all of us the first legal drink as opposed to trying to make yourself look old enough to drink legally.
Getting carded will make her feel good for about a year and then it will become a nascence and by the time she’s 35 she’ll be flattered.

So I tell D1 about the living arraignments at D2’s boyfriends place.

“Weird eh”?

“Weird, no that’s not weird”
“I’ll tell you weird”.

So she tells me the story about her boyfriend’s friend.
His friend, a female who still lives at home with her parents, has been going out with this guy who still lives with his EX girlfriend.
Not only do they live together but they also sleep in the same bed.
Apparently nothing happens, they just sleep and his friend sees nothing wrong with it.
OK, that trumps my weird story.

I don’t know.
I know when I was younger I was a little wild.
I spent my 35th birthday in bed with six women.
Dated twins at the same time.
Slept with a couple of women with their husbands blessing
There is more so I know strange but this is weird.

The last person I want to wake up to in the morning packing wood is my EX.
I don’t care how bad the economy is I would rather a cardboard box in a dark alley than to share a home and or bed with someone I don’t want to be in the same room with most times.

How does that work?
When his EX AKA roommate goes to work his girlfriend comes over and he screws her in the bed and when the EX comes home she can smell them still in her bed.
So calls her boyfriend to come by after to fuck in the warm bed still shrouded in their lingering scent.

I don’t know what I find weirder, them living together or the girlfriend accepting their living arraignment.
I know the only woman that could get between me and Inia is Salma Hayet and it’ll be a wild one if it ever happened “wink”.

From strange to weird, the evolution of reality or do the times dictate our lives?
Have we succumbed to the pressures of life and stopped fighting for our independence?
To each their own I guess, all I know is for me, its beyond strange.
It’s weird.

Have a nice day

Walker

Poarched ©

As you can see they've started working on my porch

Have a nice weekend

Walker

Pissing Sawdust ©

I woke up the other day and walked out the front door and looked up at nothing.
Just clear blue skies.
This is the first time I have ever stood in my doorway and experienced this feeling.
Usually I wouldn’t be able to do this because of the porch and balcony but that’s not a problem today because it’s all gone.
Feels fucken weird.
I have been walking out this front door for most of my life and all I can remember is this huge behemoth spanning two houses and two levels and now it was gone.
Poof just like that.
Six guys tore it down and hauled it off so fast it was scary.

It was time for it to go because it was rotting and no one wants to walk under and two to balcony.
At the post office the mailmen used to pull straws to see who was going to deliver my mail.

The only thing the kept was the roof, which was in good shape and saving us $3000.
It was being supported by three fifteen-foot columns.
It’s something to see.
Three long poles holding up this roof.
A guy walks up and asks if it was always like that.
Yes, yes it is and every Friday night the hookers come by to ride them.
That’s why I keep them greased so they don’t get any splinters.

On a positive note I will be getting a brand new porch and balcony for my bedroom that will be safe.
It will also double as my onsuite.
It is a shorter walk to the balcony to piss in the front garden than walking down the hall to the washroom.

My friends have been calling me to ask what happened to the front part of my house.
I told them termites ate it all but they new one will be made of fate metal wood.
Well, it’s my way of saving part of a forest and recycling a lot of pop cans.
That and fifteen grand out of our pockets.
Yup, if we went all wood it would have cost thirty thousand but because we went with aluminium columns with a centre post and aluminium railings we saved half.

Oh yeah, me and my brother got into it over the railings.
He wanted to get glass and I wanted the spindles.
Who the fuck is going to have to clean the glass?
Me of course because he doesn’t do shit like that so spindles it is.
Besides I can’t piss through glass and I don’t want to be pushing up 30 inches on my toes trying to get over the top of the railing only to fall over.
What can I say, I think ahead.

Now I am painting my porch in the basement.
Huh?
What, what was that?
You’re painting your porch in the basement?
Yeah, I am painting my porch in the basement.

What can I say?
I figured it was easier for me to prime all the wood before they nailed it all up.
It’s fucken cold out there lately.
After its nailed up all I got to do is give it one coat of paint before the snow comes and I am done.

This should have been started a month ago but the contractor was busy so now, I’m busy but I don’t mind.
I get bored easy and I hate being bored.

Oh, and I am closing in on my 1000th post.
I figured I would make it a reader’s choice post.
What would you like me to write about for my thousandth post, which is about eight posts away?
There you go.
Give me the subjects to lead me to my thousandth post.

OK, I got to go back to painting

Have a nice day

Walker

Tightening The Screws ©

I must be getting old or metric is finally getting to me.
I was reading the news and I saw that the OPP caught a bunch of guys speeding this week in their safety week blitz.
There was even a 71-year old guy popped for racing because he was driving 70 kms over the speed limit.
A guy on a motorcycle going over the speed limit by 100km.
Is that fast?

I mean, I was born before metric was installed and learned to drive in miles per hour (MPH) not kilometres per hour (KPH) so to me metric feels like turtle speed per hour (TSPH) compared to when I started driving but that’s cool.
With more cars on the road today I can see where slowing traffic down for the safety of the whole thing but let me tell you, 50, 70 or 100 km over the speed limit is a joke compared to when I was a 16 years old with my souped up Dart.
I did NOT have the fastest car in the city because there were dozens of guys with a lot of extra cash and the love of speed that blew my doors off when we raced.
Oh yeah, we raced.
Between midnight and 6am you can hear the screeching tires and roaring engines for miles around, usually followed by the blare of sirens.

In 1981 I got clocked by the OPP for doing 130 mph over the speed limit.
That’s miles not kilometres and the cops were hot on my ass.
We hit speeds of 180, 190 miles per hour or 300 kms.
I am not saying it’s a good thing, it’s crazy but for people to be freaking out over a guy who was going 170kms, that’s 105 mph.
Why do they make cars that go that fast for anyway if you are not allowed to lean on the gas?
HELLOOOOOOOOOO

It’s like the drinking and driving laws.
I understand and I believe it’s a good thing but the way they are going, soon you won’t be allowed to drink anything at all and drive.
As it is now you can’t drive with over a blood alcohol level over .05.
Fuck, you can hit .05 just by kissing a drunk.
What’s that, about a beer every hour and a half?
And the fines. $6000, $12,000.

I am not saying laws to curb speeding and impaired driving are bad.
In fact I support them, to a point.
For instance, anyone under the age of 21 in Ontario can’t have any alcohol in their blood.
Why 21?
Why not 19 which is the legal drinking age?

Right now if you get your license you are on probation for a couple of years and you are not allowed to have any alcohol in your blood for that period of time.

So if two kids, a 16 year old and a 19 year old went for their licenses together and passed.
After two years the 16 year old is 18 and the 19 year old is old enough to have a beer and drive.
That’s if he waits for an hour and a half after each drink and drinks a lot of water in between.

My problem is not that they are trying to make it safe.
My problem with a lot of this shit, is the over kill.
When laws become more and more stringent it takes away a lot of your freedoms.
We are slowly becoming a penal society and the bleeding hearts are waving the big dildo in the air that they are going to fuck you with.

The Temperance Society has slipped on a new dress, MADD (Mothers against drunk drivers), MMTL (Mothers married to lawyers) and attacked alcohol from both directions.
It’s only a matter of time before they try to ban booze and driving all together.

I believe in the beginning they were doing a good thing but now I think they are pushing it to far and the government is listening to them.
More education is needed not more laws.
The more laws that are written the more crime will rise.
Sounds stupid but it’s not.
Most crime is people rebelling against society.

If you don’t want people speeding don’t make fast cars or give them lanes to do it on.
If you don’t want people to drive drunk then make it mandatory to have a breath analyzer attached to the ignition of every new car made.
They exist, use them or do they need these problems for the money?

Me I don’t drink or drive.
Get stoned or drive either but I have in the past.
I made a conscious decision not to any more.
I tell my kids and everyone else’s why they shouldn’t but I won’t take a bat and threaten them so they never do.

Government better watch out that they don’t beat the dog to often.
It may turn and bite them back.

Speed can kill you.
Drunk driving kills the innocent.
To many laws kill the soul.
It’s all ugly any way you look at it

Have a nice day

Walker

The Nuts In The Tree ©

“Sigh”.
I don’t understand some people.
I know me.
I know that right now I want to shoot someone and I mean for real.
There are people in this world that make me feel that way.
Tyrants.

This brings me to my brother and sister in law.
Tyrants.
Mean fucken people who do their best to hurt each other be it physically or mentally.
I have no fucken idea why they are together and now they went and bought a house together.

What a fucken nightmare that turned into.
They didn’t plan and it took them two months to prepare the house for their arrival and when that day came, it turned out that my SIL hadn’t even started to pack with only twenty-four hours to move.
Did I mention my SIL is a hoarder?

Yup she drags things home from other people’s garbage then hiding it in the basement of the building she lived in.
Do you have any fucken idea after thirteen years how much shit that could grow into.
It was obviously spread all over the place that she has a problem.
A problem among her other problems one of which is to try and ruin everyone else’s life because hers sucks.

My SIL is not happy and tries to make people feel like her, miserable.
So far half the block hates her and the other half is at war because of her.
One couple has split up because of rumours she spread.
Two sisters were at each others throats because of my SIL making up false accusations.
Oh and planting me right in the middle.

She has talked shit about Inia and her kids because Inia refused to let her take her young son out in the car when she was so drunk she could barely walk.
Not only has she said things about Inia but also criticized Inia’s five-year old son just to start trouble so she could say, “Everyone is attacking me”.

She tells people she is taking my brother’s daughter and moving to California and he will never see her again.
Tells anyone who will listen how she pays for everything.
I don’t know how she can with her 1500 a month when the bills add up to three grand a month.
Probably spends a third of that on her drinking habit and man is she a lousy drunk.
She becomes one of those people you try to hide from at a party.



My brother is a mean fucker.
She drives him nuts with her BS but he prods and verbally attacks her all the time, causing more trouble.
She is a pest in many ways but no one should be called a cunt twenty times a day.
I don’t know why these two are together.
It’s scary and discouraging to those who still believe in relationships.

They are two of the reasons I keep to myself and don’t let those around me near them.
Me is one thing but when they slip past your guard they do their best to either take what you have or to try and destroy it.

Right now she has my EX up the street almost everyday and is telling her all about what MY life.
The woman has no idea about who and what I am so she is inventing who I am to my EX.
D2 who was there at the time and jump in at them and told them to shut up and to stop lying about me.

Personally I don’t care what people say about me, I can take it but I don’t care for people who attack other’s especially a five year old boy who can’t defend himself.
The SIL’s oldest daughter is a chip of the nut shell as well.
She is learning how to be a bitch from her mother.

The SIL doesn’t care whom she talks to or what she says.
She insulted one of my nephews by telling the kid his mother was a bitch.
Why not go to his mother and tell her to her face so she could rip hers off I don’t know but the SIL would rather go after our kids instead of confronting us.
I call someone like that a coward.
My brother is no better.

I don’t understand how people like that could live with each other.
How they try and disrupt others who are happy with their lives just so that their misery could have company.

Nuts

Have a nice day

Walker

Turkey Day ©

I would like to wish everyone in Canada a Happy Thanksgiving or turkey day and some call it.
We celebrated ours yesterday while Inia was still here with the kids.
It was fun for the most part.
I’ll tell you about later but for now I think we should enjoy the bounty we have.
Thanksgiving is a day we enjoy the fruits of our labour be it financial or spiritual.
It’s one of those customs brought over by the pilgrims when they first settle in Plymouth to celebrate that year’s harvest and at that table were the friends who had help them survive.

Happy Turkey Day with your friends and families.

Walker

Milk This ©

You know, Somewhere some place life smacked it’s head against the wall and is a little fuzzy I think.
Now I don’t make a lot of money.
I could but I promised to be good and have………mostly.

With what little I do have I make it go far, really far but they are really testing me lately.
I went shopping the other day and needed some milk so I went to pick up a bag.
It’s been a while since I bought any.

I walked to the back where they keep it and I stand in front of the fridge looking at all the different types of milk and prices.
Prices?
Last time I bought milk it was $4.99 a bag.
I always buy bags because buying anything less would be fucken stupid.
A pint is $1.89 and a quart is $2.59 with a half gallon being $3.89 so for another buck and change you get more milk that you need.

Then you end up freezing a couple of bags until you do but when you do need it its funky colour yellow and you don’t feel like drinking piss coloured milk so you stick it back in the freezer and hope in another six months it will be white again.

So I look at the milk and prices and see what I normally buy is now $5.99, homogenized, skim, 1% or 2% it doesn’t matter.
What a minute.
The same company sells two other types but it’s more expensive, $6.99 and $7.99.
What the fucks the difference?
The expensive milk comes from celebrity cows or something or are they virgin cows in which case you aren’t milking a female buddy if you’re filling the bucket with a white creamy liquid.

They have 7 different types of milk.
The expensive one is called Purfilter.
WTF does that mean/
What, the milk I buy they strain through the hay or something.
Why don’t they just filter all of it the same way?
Is this legal?

Another one is called physical because it has good calcium.
What?
Whoa, whoat does that mean?
The, the calcium in the milk I buy is what, brittle?

Skim plus?
Lactose free I can understand and they have one with Omega 3 added but organic?
That one costs $11.99.
I bet when the expiry day passes on the organic milk they take the small bags out and put them in the regular milk bags and sell it to us.
May be why I am feeling a little brittle lately.

Who they hell pays $12 bucks for milk?
I mean……..what’s that?
A bag of chocolate milk is $3.99.
Fuck, I don’t care if the milk came from a white cow or a brown one as long as it has four nipples and not just one.

I don’t get some things.
Milk down in the states is under two bucks a gallon but up here it’s triple, if not more.
I should get myself one of those fainting goats for a pet and every tome she faints I’ll run out there with a bucket and pull her nipples for a glass or two.

“Dad”
“Yeah”?
“The mac and cheese looks funny and it tastes like……chocolate”?
“Shut up and eat your dinner”.



Have a nice day

Walker