blue moon (2)

Tuesday, March 23, 2010

March Madness ©

March is one of the busiest months around here.
I thought Christmas was bad.
Three birthdays…..four.
Then there is March Madness and just around the corner there is Easter.
One thing I will say though, it’s been a Boobacious month so far and I know it will end with a big BANG.

D1 turned 22 the other day and asked if she could throw a birthday party and if her father would make some of his dips.
So I told her I would fork out for her birthday party and make everything she needed.
Sex and cooking, what I love to do the most.
Pay taxes is the least.

For those of you who haven’t been reading that long, D1 is new to the party scene and drinking was something she never did before.
Sure she has a sip here and there but not in the scale as what was going to happen.

The first real party she went to last year she came back puking all over the place.
She would have made Linda Blaire proud.
After that day I sat her down and explained booze to her an its ups and down.
There is a right way to drink and on certain occasion there is a proper bad way to drink.
The worse way to drink is to mix sweet and gross together.
That only gives you a colorful rainbow of swill to project across the room and down your friend’s wife top as she is giving him a tittie shot causing him to deposit the last beer he drank and the nachos he ate in the one-ounce cup nuzzling between her twin mountains.

After explaining all this to her, my niece showed up and put a shot glass that was tied to a long beaded rope around her neck then told her she had to have a shot with everyone that walked through the door.
20 people walked through the door in the space of an hour.

Me, I was upstairs in my room with Inia on the laptop, my bag of herb, some water and the TV on.
My room is well equipped with everything I need usually.
The kids are scared to go in there.
Between the erotic artwork on the walls, drug paraphernalia, sex paraphernalia, clothes scattered all over the place, plants and the cat rolling around on the floor high on what every he’s chewing she doesn’t want to see anything, NOTHING she says.

So I was barricaded in my room while D1 and her bunch were downstairs.
After about two hours I got hungry and I have made a lot of food for the party so I went downstairs and found them all in my kitchen lined up like drones around the wall.

OK, I see this party needed a little umff.
Especially this one chick with the big boobs.
They looked so sad hanging there so I went to the fridge and pulled out a tray to help lift up their spirits.

I had made fifty two-ounce margarita and wild cherry blueberry bomb jelly shooters for them with a special four ounce one for D1 that she was spoon fed by the end of the night.
Along with the jelly shooters I dropped a bottle of tequila and another of triple sec on the table and told them I wanted to hear some fucken noise then gave D2 the camera and told her if the one with the big hoots got drunk and popped them out, to get me a picture and headed off to my room with my plate of food.
Yeah, yeah I’m training my kids to get me T&A pix HA HA HA!!!!!!!

About thirty minutes later my niece was trying to break down my door to have a toke with me but I told her I wasn’t in.
After she left I opened the door to loud pounding music and went downstairs and found them jumping up and down like monkeys in the TV room.
In the kitchen, there wasn’t a single jelly shooter left.
D1 was staggering blind all over the place with the shot glass still hanging around her neck.

The party went on until about 2am when everyone started clearing out and D2 came to my room to tell me it was safe to come out once more.
D1 asked if one of her friends could sleep over at my place and I said it was fine, she could use the spare room then she left and went home.

I walked into the kitchen and chesty smiled at me and thanked me for letting her spend the night.
I told her it wasn’t a problem and went up stairs to my room to collect my laptop and plate to move back down to the TV room.

AS I was cleaning up and heard something behind me and turned around and Chesty was standing behind me at the foot of the bed.
Ummm ok, I asked if she needed something and she said she was looking for D2’s room.
I stepped to the front room of my bedroom and pointed down the hall and told her that was D2’s room.

Now, before this all happened, D2 walked out of the washroom and say Chesty walk into my bedroom and let her mind run away with her.
My kids are nuts about Inia and they aren’t happy when they see another woman hit on me and seeing her walk into my bedroom made her uncomfortable and ran to her bedroom.

Chesty thanked me and headed down the hall to D2’s room and knocked on the door and after opening it she slipped in.
Personally I think Chesty is gay, I could be wrong but I see her grabbing a lot of the women in a personal manner so I figured she was going to hit on d2.
So I went downstairs to watch TV.

In the morning D2 came downstairs as I was making breakfast and said, ”OMG, I saw her walking into your bedroom and thought, you know what I thought so I locked myself in my room”.
“Then there was a knock on my door and when I opened it she comes in and asked me if she could ask me a personal question”.
“I’m thinking, OMG she wants to ask me permission to sleep with me dad”.

She bent down and said………
I’ll leave the rest to your imagination
I'm to busy writing my next post, "It's a mad mad boob shaped world".

Have a nice day



Luka said...

Now that's what I call a party!

(Put me on the guest list if I'm ever in the area!)

Walker said...

Luka: Oh no no no.... you want the next post I'm writing.
It's the one with the party i went to last Saturday ;)

Luka said...

I can't wait! :)

BlazngScarlet said...

Hmmmm ..... she asked to sleep with your daughter?!

You do have a way of getting women into your bedroom don't you?!

Boxer said...

and the beat goes on......

Just telling it like it is said...

Did I tell you Happy Birthday!!kisses

Walker said...

BlazngScarlet: They just follow me.
I think it's the cat luring them in

Walker said...

Boxer: It always does :)

Walker said...

Just telling it like it is: Not yet, it's Friday ;)