blue moon (2)

Wednesday, October 08, 2008

Falling Ballots ©

La la laaaaaaaaaaaaaa
Do do dooooooooooo
I wonder where the summer has gone and why did it go away
Now all I see is dead leaves, fallen from all the trees

Autumn, Fall
Whatever you want to call it
With its shades of red
Flames its way across the countryside

Gone are the long days
The short nights
Cold creeps in and steals the warmth away
Leaving just a chill behind

Gone are the noisy kids from all the streets and alleys
Hiding behind brick walls
Unseen or heard of
Until the spring

Gone are the hot chicks in the short skirts
Skimpy tops
Sandy beaches and brilliant sunsets
The call of the loon on a quiet lake

Gloomy skies prevail
Grey is their shade
This could only mean one thing
It’s the darkest of times

A fucken Election Year

The world is busy watching the elections in the states and not really paying attention to their own business.
I find it’s so funny.
Being Canadian I am interested in what happens to my neighbor down south because of our proximity so I watch a lot of the news going on in that election but we are having one here to.

In fact I have already met all of my candidates personally including the Prime Minister who was out an about drumming up support for his Conservative party.
They’re like the republicans down in the states.

You know how you tell the difference between Liberal/Democrat politicians from a Conservative/Republican politician?
The Conservative/Republican has a look like he/her has to go for a shit real bad but is holding it in while the Liberal/Democrat politician looks happy and content because you know the fucker crapped their pants and are now wallowing in it.

I had a cousin in Greece a couple of months ago refer to me as an American.
Now I have nothing against the Yanks and am damn happy to have them for neighbors because they’re so close if we fuck up we can just blame them and everyone would believe us.
Hey, everyone else blames them why can’t we at least we stand by each other when it’s needed like during the Iran crisis?
And before anyone says anything, we did it for free and not for any favors as it should always be between friends.
At any rate I’m a proud Canadian and we are nothing like Americans I told him.

Even our politics and politicians are different.
Hell, even our political assassins are different.
Actually I think our politicians were a little smarter back in their day.

Back in April 7 1868 we had our first and last political assassination when Thomas D’arcy McGee was shot in the back of the head as he opened the door of his place.

Now they got some guy and hung him stating that he was a member of a group against him but I have it from a good source, the great great great great great grandson of a hobo sleeping in the alley near the door of the shooting that says it was some guy who was pissed because good ole Thomas D’arcy McGee was throwing it into his old lady but the cops didn’t believe the Hobo.

BUT, what that did do, is make politicians here think, if they made it illegal to own handguns then they stand a better chance of not being shot in the head when they fuck up.
Now this works to a point.
Even here we have sickos lets face it and we have assassins to in the crowd but they have their hands tied because they can’t buy a gun so they have to resort to pies.
A little different from the states but pies do have an advantage for the assassin.
Security is to busy laughing so they manage to escape.



Security, there’s a joke.
Our prime minister has a couple of cops watching him some times but most times he has to fend for himself like when this guy got into the face of one of our Prime Ministers and the PM had to lay a beating on him while security took bets.



Fuck, someone broke into the PM's house one night while they were sleeping.
Seems that he forgot to put the alarm on and it was the gaurd's night off.
Luckily his wife cornered the burglar in the hallway while the PM was hiding in the closet and pummelled the guy until the police got there to pry her legs from around the burglar's waist.

It’s not like we have a lot of money to spend up here in Canada on security.
I mean the only people that really hate us are the Quebecers but to be on the safe side the govt bought the Prime Minister a bulletproof car.
We still have it AND looks like the day it was bought.
Probably because the bulletproof glass was so expensive we couldn’t afford the engine to go with it so it’s still sitting in the parliamentary parking lot still looking good baby.

We do have something like Air Force one though; it’s called Cessna One.
One stands for the number of propellers.

In the States there are two main parties, Republican and Democrats.

In Canada, Federal Parties only:

Main Ones

Bloc Québécois (founded in 1991) - social democratic, Quebec nationalist
Conservative Party of Canada (founded in 2003) - conservative, Canadian neoconservatism
Liberal Party of Canada (founded in 1867) - liberal
New Democratic Party (founded in 1961) - social democratic
Green Party of Canada (founded 1983) - Green (by change of party of a sitting member: no Green federal candidate has ever been elected)

The rest:

Animal Alliance Environment Voters Party of Canada (founded in 2005) - environmentalist, animal liberationist
Canadian Action Party (founded in 1997) - Populist, Canadian Nationalist
Christian Heritage Party of Canada (founded in 1987) - Social conservative
Communist Party of Canada (founded in 1921) - Communist
Communist Party of Canada (Marxist-Leninist) (founded in 1970) - Communist/Marxist-Leninist influenced by Maoism and the ideas of Enver Hoxha
First Peoples National Party of Canada (founded in 2005) - Aboriginal rights advocacy
Libertarian Party of Canada (founded in 1975) - Libertarian
Marijuana Party of Canada (founded in 2000) - pro-marijuana legalization
Neorhino.ca (founded in 2007) - Joke party.
Newfoundland and Labrador First Party (founded in 2007) - Newfoundland and Labrador advocation
People's Political Power of Canada (founded in 2006)- Social Conservative, Populist
Progressive Canadian Party (founded in 2004) - progressive conservative, Red Tory
Western Block Party (founded 2005) - western separatist and paleoconservative/libertarian conservative
Work Less Party (founded in 2007) - Labour rights
Absolutely Absurd Party
Canadian Workers Party
Cosmopolitan Party of Canada (founded 2003)
Canadian Extreme Wrestling Party
National-Socialist Party of Canada (founded 2006)
Democracy Party of Canada (founded 2003)
Direct Access Democracy Canada (founded 2003)
Direct Democracy Party of Canada (founded 2004)
FemINist INitiative of Canada (founded 2005)
Freedom Party of Canada (founded 2001, formerly Unparty)
Global Party of Canada (founded 2002)
Malevolent Party of Canada (founded 2004)
Nationalist Party of Canada (founded 1977)
Parti citron (Lemon Party)
Parti égalité du Canada (Equality Party of Canada)
The Party Party
Party of Alberta (founded 2006)
Popular Democratic Party (founded 2003)
Sex Party (founded 2005) [1]
Socialist Alternative
Socialist Party of Canada
United People's Party of Canada (founded 2006)
Western Canada Party (founded 2005)
National Alliance for a Higher Minimum Wage (founded 2007)

Looks like a Chinese buffet.

The main parties (Liberals, Conservatives, New Democratic Party, Bloq Quebecois and the Green party dominate most of the votes with either the Liberals or Conservatives usually winning.
Unlike the States, if a party doesn’t get a majority they could form a minority government with another party and are pretty much at the mercy of those who helped them get into power and usually have to concede on some of the issues to the other party for helping them get in power.
Personally I like that.
It makes sure no one has all the power because if they get a majority then they will have Carte blanch for four years and you can’t even shoot the mother fucker.
Pie them yes.

There isn’t much mud slinging up here or you don’t hear about it as much with McCain and Obama’s mudslinging being juicier to watch in the States.
McCain calls Obama a liar.
I’m not going to dip into that crap.

Have any of you every wondered why these people want to be our leaders.
It’s not like the pay is good compared to what they get in the private sector.
They say it’s to help the ordinary people but I have yet to hear opposition party leaders say, “Hey man let’s go for a beer and some wings and see if we can make our country work better together”.
Or “Hey that’s a great idea, maybe we can push it through”.
Instead the winner buries the good idea because it wasn't theirs.

Every four years we are asked to sit back and watch supposedly grown adults act worse than selfish little bastards so they could get a job that could result in their death for less money than they could be making in a safe job.

They say that any ordinary person could become leader of the country.
If you have 100 million dollars to spend that is and that’s another thing.
Why would someone spend that much money to get a $500,000 a year job?
Eh, come on tell me.

So here is the plan.
I am voting for a minority government along with everyone else that have gathered for the same thing.
There is no way in hell I want to see either one of these major parties with full power especially right now with the economy down the shitter and the conservatives would be the worse of both evils.

The Liberals would borrow and throw it away but the conservatives would take it from us instead of borrowing and wasting it.
So, minority Govt it is for me and my crew of about 30 (ten of which voted conservative last election) to go with the others rallying around the same banner in the region.

Don’t you just love politics?
One thing I will say is that it is your duty to go out and vote no matter who you support.
We owe that to the people who fought and still fight for us to have the privilege to be able to speak our minds and vote for the way of life we wish to live otherwise the votes you didn’t cast would be like the dieing leaves falling from the trees without a sound or whimper in the Autumn or is it Fall.

On a closing note I would like to wish all the lying fucken politicians, North and South of 60 all the best in their efforts to become our leaders.
Let’s hope you remember some of us little people who got you there you bastards
I don't know what is sicker, me or politics at least i will get better.

Have a nice day

Walker

27 comments:

Megan said...

Thanks for the crash course in Canadian politics.

I'd definitely join the Party Party.

Damn, man, what kind of a flu or whatever have you got? Ain't you better yet?

Gypsy said...

Hi Walker

Sorry I have been absent for a while and am just catching up. I hope you are getting better by now.

We have a lot of these smaller political parties too. I never vote for the big boys either. I realise I am wasting my vote but it's not a waste if I don't want either of the major parties to win. They all promise the world and deliver nothing so I figure the Marijuana Party can have my vote. They are thinking of legalising it here for the use of cancer and MS sufferers so it's my duty to help them out :)

Bud said...

Thanks for explaining Canada to me. I can't imagine why any sane person would want to run for office. They are nuts by definition.

Monogram Queen said...

All I can say is your PM has WAY bigger balls than our POTUS ever has.... Canada Rocks!

The Troll said...

That was a very good post and you hit a key-point that most Canuckistanians and Euro-Trash don't understand.

INNER VOICES said...

ahhh... politics for breakfast.

*goes outside to wash it down with some coffee*

Scarlet said...

We (us 'murricans) have smaller political parties .... they just get squashed by the 2 bullies on the block.

YAY DEMOCRACY!

Fire Byrd said...

Hey at least you don't have the BNP, who are gaining ground here in the UK. They just want to get rid of everyone who isn't white, regardless of where they were born.

(British Nationalist Party)

Puss-in-Boots said...

We had a Federal election last year. Got rid of one bad one, replaced him with another...a globetrotter...go figure. To be quite cynical about it all...one political party is the same as the other. It's all about lining one's own pockets...

Walker said...

Megan: I got the flu Saturday night from Mike. I don't know what it is ut if i am not standing in the shower trying to cool down i am on the couch shaking like a vibrator from the cold.
I think i am getting etter though.

Walker said...

Gypsy: Nice to see you young lady.
I hope all is wewlll with you down there with the spring weather in the air.
I have been known to vote for the marijuana party when there is a slaughter in the making. I figure its like a statement rather than a wasted vote.

Walker said...

Bud: It's all aout the power to many of these people.
Ego trips, status.
THey could have it as far as \i'm concerned.

Walker said...

Monogram Queen: Mr Cretien wasn't shy to push his weight around thats for sure.
Just like Pierre decades earlier who wasn't afraid to jump into a crowd and party

Walker said...

The Troll : I think everyone understands they just play possom.

Walker said...

INNER VOICES: Politic any time and you need something strong to take the taste from your mouth and mind

Walker said...

Scarlet : Here is they win a seat they keep it ;)

Walker said...

Fire Byrd : We have the loq from queec who wants to move the whole provence to florida, is that the same.
THeir leader a number a few years ago said after loosing the referendom on separation that they lost because of the "Fucken immigrants"

Walker said...

Puss-in-Boots: they are all the opposite shoe any way you look at it.
They all find ways to screw us to fulfil a promise we can't afford

Teresa said...

I had no idea there were so many parties in Canada. No wonder I like it there. If they could just get real football.....

A.B. said...

Good Lord, I thought our politics were complicated.

I just want November 4th to get here - I am exhausted by it all.

(anonymous boxer)

INNER VOICES said...

a.b. i thought it was "remember, remember the fifth of november"... i could be wrong.

gab said...

I hate cold but right now Im glad to be alive. Missed it? GO READ ALL!

Walker said...

Teresa: we get real football on TV :)

Walker said...

A.B.: they only campaign here for a month after an election is called. easy as pie :)

Walker said...

INNER VOICES: I only remember evelyne with the big hooters

Walker said...

gab: i hate cold to and never miss it

Dot`sThoughts said...

I will be glad when it is over as long as we end up heading in the opposite direction from the way we are heading now. Last 8 years sure did a good job trying to destroy our country. We can`t last with another one who thinks the same way. Things sure would be different if instead of the electors voting, just the peoples vote was counted.I keep wondering what happened to the old saying " of the people, by the people and for the people? Guess the government forgot who these real people are.