blue moon (2)

Monday, January 14, 2008

Answers Part Two ©

I am back with part two of the answers to your questions but first, yesterday was my father’s name day party.

I am sure you’re asking WTF is a name day, I hope you know what a party is?
Greek Orthodox Christians take their first names from the bible, usually saints.
So every year on the day a particular saint because a saint they celebrate one’s name day.

Last week was John the Baptists day so all Johns celebrate their name day.

Mine is in August when we celebrate the great saint,
LUKE SKY WALKER

Any how we all gathered at my parents for dinner, about 25 of us.
My daughters got to meet some new old faces again.
I think they are beginning to loosen up a bit more.
My oldest looks at me now when I talk to her and not my socks.
I don’t know how my socks feel about looking all that attention but hey, they’ll get lost in the dryer one day so who cares.

Most of my uncles and aunts were there it in some way its nice seeing them all like this together.
I remember them all like this when I was a kid crawling around on the floor.
We were all a lot younger back then and they could beat the shit out of me at will if I fucked up.
They probably still can ha ha ha.

That was a long time ago.
Today they are mostly in their eighties but still together like it was over forty years ago.
Nothing bad has touched this immediate group even though they have lost brothers, sisters, mothers and fathers in Greece; here they are still the same.

They have all had their moments with destiny more than once.
My mother was blown up with her brother in a field by allied bombers, they are still here together laughing at the table over sixty years later.
Their oldest brother sitting across from them, a veteran of the civil war and one of the biggest battles in the region.
It was and is said that he was so drunk while the fighting was going on he couldn’t remember what side he was on.

My father, a veteran of the Greek partisans as were most of my family during the war and served to fight with and against the state until he had no choice but to leave.
His brother a Korean veteran who waded through pools of blood as a medic while the enemy was running past him to patch up a wounded UN soldier.

My aunt walked home one day after the soldiers had passed through the village and found all her family, those who had been home decapitated and their heads staked out infront of the house for all to see.

A quarter of the people they knew and loved have met with a violent death but as much as they have mourned their deaths they also wear them as badges of honor.
I have heard many stories from them, told to them from their grandfathers and those before them with their lives added to the history of the family.

When they are together it’s not a quiet evening, it’s always loud and raucous and the young people have to go to the other rooms.
I keep telling them they all need hearing aids but no one believes me so they yell all the time so they could hear themselves talk.

Name days, Birthdays, Anniversaries, they all serve a purpose.
They are not there so you can celebrate getting old and closing in on the end.
We don’t gather to show how much we care and appreciate the person or people being honoured.
NOOOOOO , not at all.
The only two reasons we have these events, they are to see if these people still remember their names and if they don’t, to remind them what their names are as they get older and the other events are to remind them how old they are and that they still have a wife/husband and to leave theirs alone.

After we pigged out on the ridiculously massive amount of food that was prepared the younger bunch took off upstairs for the video games and computers and I sat with my parents and other relatives in the kitchen watching TV and listening to my uncles commenting about the show that was on.

They were watching a classical dance competition and my uncles Theo was yelling, due to his deafness and excitement combined about how the woman was dressed like a whore with her ass in the air more times than it was covered.
The other old geezers nodded in support of his statements.

He lives with his daughter and she along with her husband started taking dance lessons and my uncles watches them practice in their living room and he says they look and dance like two penguins all dressed up with no place to go.

I looked at the woman on TV and I thought she looked good to me and nothing wrong with the way she was dressed but to an eighty year old and the way they used to think I can see why he was saying what he was and went head to head with my uncle.

Me, and my uncle Theo have a history of butting heads over the years.
He is the uncle that stopped talking to me because I proved Christ was a Jew.
Fuck he thought Christ was a Christian
Duh
Nooooooooo.

So I asked him what he found wrong with her.
He said it was the way she was dressed and how the guy held her upside down so everyone could see her ass.
They others mumbled their support.

My aunts were waiting for the assault; they know me well enough to know I wasn’t going to let it go.
My mother accused me once of trying to push her brother to a heart attack by constantly disagreeing with him.
Well he is wrong a lot; it’s not my fault.

So I told my uncle that maybe one day his daughter will be wearing the same outfit and dancing in the living room just like the girl on TV.
My aunts were the first to gag and laugh.

Then I asked him if he was upset because of the way she was dressed or because they never had this stuff when he was younger.
He thought about it for a second and came back with that yes, if they had it back when he was younger he wouldn’t complain as much and the others nodded while laughing with him.

Over the next few hours they started drifting home and I found myself back at my place stretched out on the couch wondering why I ate so much and how much longer will I have all of them together like this.

After a little while I came here to work on part two.
Actually I did some research to confirm what I thought I knew and I was right.
I was asked by Puss In Boots if I could touch my nose with my tongue and I told her I used to but for some reason I can’t now.
Now I had once heard that there were two body parts that never stopped growing and that was your nose and ears.
Actually that’s not true, every time I see a hot chick walk by I have another body part that grows.

I remember when I first heard that, I was with my EX, a French Canadian woman who had a honker on her, typical of the French.
When she heard that the nose never stops growing she almost fainted, then started crying.
I had to console her and told her we could look for a plastic surgeon to chop off some of it and donate it to someone or couple of people needing a little more nose.

So my answer to your question is, I used to but my nose moved away.
No, I can’t lick my nose or any nose anymore unless the nose was on someone else’s face.

Cara The not so Unknown Blogger asks with all things on go for the visit in March---will there be more fu@*ing or eating going on?

Fu@*ing or eating, is there a difference, I love to do both and at the same time is more than just fulfilling.
In any case it will be interesting having a number of ex lovers from around the world staying with me at the same time for my birthday.

Oh and I am never surprised of who I find when I open my door.

Gypsy asked, Is there one thing that you regret doing that you would like to have the chance to put right?

I have many regrets but there are none I would go back to change.
I have been disappointed by many people and I have disappointed many people but not everyone can be happy all the time.
I pay for many of those in my dreams and will forever.

I firmly believe there is some good that comes out of every disaster, thus I have won each and every time not lost because of that.
At first we don’t see it because your hurt or pissed but as time goes on and you look at what you have and how you have moved forward to get where you are you, understand better.

If I took the job I was offered when I was 19 I would be looking at 6 years to retirement and a full pension but I chose to help my parents and lost out but they did well.

If I accepted an offer from someone that would have left me living in the lap of luxury but I chose love instead of money.

If I hadn’t forgotten my picks on the computer desk in June I wouldn’t have played a quick pick and played my numbers and won 100,000 dollars, but I didn’t and lost.

If i had not loved and lost how would I know what love was?

There are many ifs but I can live with the choices I made and wouldn’t change any of it because it would only change what has happened and a lot of nice thing might not be here like meeting you Gypsy and everyone else.

Patti Cake’s question was, What is the one thing that you remember made you laugh the hardest in your lifetime?

I can’t answer that.
I love to laugh and over the years I have laughed so hard I have even peed myself, I was younger, A LOT younger.
Many people have made me laugh and I would like to think I have cause a chuckle or two.

I think one of the funniest things I have seen that made me laugh hard was a horrific accident.
I know it sounds cruel and heartless but it was the end that was hilarious.
One of our friends was a wannabe street racer and had spend a small fortune on a 68 Charger.
The first time he took it out he had Mike and Phil in the car and at 100 MPH he lost control and hit a bridge.
The boys were lucky no one was killed and the way they used to build cars is what probably saved their life.
Cars back then were built like tanks.
Buddy was devastated when he looked at his car but he loved it so much he spent two years rebuilding it along with another pile of money.
One summer day we all took off for the Chrysler parks and buddy had just pulled out the newly rebuilt Charger and drove it to the park with us.
He asked if anyone wanted to drive with him but only the new guy went. HA HA HA

On the way back that evening buddy was messing around with another car and they started racing down the highway and he got the bright idea to pass the other guy from the inside on the dirt shoulder at about 100 mph.
The minute he pulled into the shoulder at that speed he lost control and his luck being what it was there was a turn up ahead and no room for him to get back on the highway.
He slid into the turn and the car started flipping on its side and went that way for about fifty feet before it ending up upside down in a drainage ditch with both ends on opposite sides.
We all got out of our cars and ran to help them.
As we got to the car we could see them both strapped into their seats hanging upside down.

I asked them if the were ok and the new guy looked at me and said, “ I am not driving with him again”.
I couldn’t hold it any more and burst out laughing.
Even buddy was laughing.
The car was history and buddy went on to smash up a couple of Trans Ams over the years before he got himself a van and slowed down.

Biker Candy left the question, if you could do anything you wanted to do, what would it be?
This is in regards to a career.

Well I went to school to become an architect but ended up working as a truck driver, cleaner, courier, bouncer, bodyguard and ran a brothel for a couple of years.
What wanted to be was a pilot but ended up a network technician in the end.
It’s a long road and sometimes you hit a side road along the way in life.

Now go Blaze’s question again, does Lil Walker hang to the left or to the right?

Since she didn’t say what the conditions were I put Lil Walker through various simulations with some help from the neighbour’s wife that I recruited, for scientific reasons you understand.

Fully dressed with underwear on, it sits in the middle.
With no underwear on, it tends to lean towards the right.
Naked and laying back in the chair oddly enough it tilted to the left so I am assuming that’s the lay back position of Lil Walker.

Now the neighbour’s wife was no help what so ever, every time i said let go she wouldn't and when she finally did release Lil Walker to see which side he would end up flopping on he only stood there pointing at the ceiling.
But we did notice when rising, he rose from the right.
I hope that answers all you questions and if you have any more feel free to ask.

Have a nice day

Walker

14 comments:

Gypsy said...

Well aren't you feeling reckless at the moment Walker? An offer for more questions....are you running a fever or something? Ok, here's mine, what happened in the sauna 3 years ago that you alluded to on my blog?

Regarding this post....I would love to attend one of your family functions, they sound a lot like mine just with more Greek being spoken. It's wonderful listening to the oldies reminisce about the old days. It sounds like their lives have been just as colourful as yours....must be in the genes.

Glad to hear that lil Walker is ambidextrous, flexible and willing to go with the flow. Can we expect March to be a quiet month on the blogging front with all that "hospitality" you'll be giving your guests? Say it isn't so!

JYankee said...

hmmm yeah.. a lot of infor on that ole' lil walker there.. LOL

Patti said...

Good answers Walker! I don't think you are EVER at a loss for words.
You are so lucky to have the old ones around you still. What I wouldn't give to have all of my aunt's & uncles with me still. I do treasure the times we had though.

Blazngfyre said...

Nothing is hotter than a man who takes the time to research so thoroughly.

I'm in lust.

*sigh*

Peter said...

More genuine Canuk/Greek wisdom from you Walker... LilWalker aside... so to speak.

nachtwache said...

You always crack me up! Your family sounds like lots of fun. March sounds like a busy month ;)
In Switzerland they celebrate Namesake day as well, at least Roman Catholics do, I don't know about the Lutherans. As kids we liked it, because we'd get presents.

Shaz said...

What a post to come back to.
I am back with my computer just now and obviously have some catching up to do. LOL I cant wait

Walker said...

Gypsy: Nope I will still be here, they got to sleep sometime :P

I bet you would have a ball dancing greek dances all over the place :)

Walker said...

JYankee : Well he complains that he doesn't get enough exposure LOL

Walker said...

Patti : I know we are happy to have them here with us and one day I will be at a loss for words :)

Walker said...

Blazngfyre: I had to make sure I had all the bases covered for you.

Ha your are just one hot lusty woman ;)

Walker said...

Peter: I like to think of it as common sense rather than wisdom. Or leassons i have learned the hard way.

Walker said...

nachtwache : We get presents to :)
Life is busy we just try to make room for some fun.

I'm glad you have a laugh when you come here

Walker said...

Shaz : WOOO HOOOO Nice to have you back :)