Going Potty ©

Friday, what should I write about on a Friday.
I could do a Sex Talk, been awhile.
I could go on a rant about how the world is all fucked up or I could pick on that idiot host Wolfe on CNN who was interviewing that student from Virginia Tech that used his cell phone to take that video as the shooting was happening.
The kid by look and his accent was obviously Middle Eastern but Wolfe had to ask the million-dollar question.
“Where are you from?”
Like it wasn’t obvious to everyone who was watching.
Who gives a fuck where he was from?
Would he have asked that question if he didn’t look like he was, I bet not.
Some people are just dickheads.
The kid’s lucky he didn’t get his head shot off trying to take that video.

It was a beautiful day here for a change and I spent yesterday afternoon doing a lot of re-potting.
For those of you that don’t know I have a lot of plants 39 to be exact and not the smokable kind for those that are snickering thinking “yeah we know the plants you are growing”.
I see that I am going to be having a bit of a problem in the near future because I am getting to good at taking care of most of them and they are growing kinda big.
The one cactus now is about six feet tall and getting wider.
I will be moving all of them outside soon so they can enjoy the summer sun and I can paint my house.

My mother has been trying to sneak into my house to see what I have but I keep stopping her at the door while she tries to peek under my arm to see if she could get a glimpse of my plants but she can’t see unless she actually walks in.
If she sees something she likes she starts harping that she wants one and then my father starts belly aching about another plant in the house and then when I go next door I am in trouble from both of them one for not giving her a plant and the other for letting her want another plant.
I just can’t win.

What I am impressed with though are my African violets, they are my one biggest nemesis.
I have never been able to keep then alive longer than a couple of months for some reason.
Many people have told me they arew tempermental and hard to deal with, boy they wern't kidding.
The first ones I got were given to me by a friend and the were big and healthy until she got on a plane and left me in charge.
By the time she came back they looked just as nice and only because I went and bought new ones.
Problem was they were a different color than the old ones that died when the flowers came out.

I have tried everything and have killed a dozen already.
This time I bought three that were dieing already from the store for a buck each.
I figured “Hey they are dieing it wont be my fault when they die”, right?
Well that’s what I thought and then they started doing well.
Go figure I buy healthy ones and they croak.
I buy ones that are croaking and they thrive go figure nothing I do goes the way it’s supposed to.
While I was dumping the old dirt into the front garden my father spots me through the window and comes out to see what I was doing and I told him I was re-potting.
He then asked me where I bought the soil from because he went out to get some and they were out.
I told him I had had stored in the basement from when the closed down last year for the season.

I always keep 5-6 large bags of potting soil and just as many of the cactus soil around in case I need to re-pot plants.
He didn’t say anything after that and went inside to his place while I dragged the plants back in.
As I was puttering around the room reorganizing the plants accord8ing to their size, the phone rang and it was my mother.
She asked me if I would give my father a bag of soil.
I didn’t mind so I went down and brought him one outside.
My father starts his tomato plants inside in March so they are ready for planting in may in the garden.
He has a small patch about 10x10 feet but gets a lot of veggies out of it.
He plants beefsteak tomatoes, cucumbers, celery zucchini and various herbs.
I give him the bag and go back inside.
About thirty minutes later the phone rings and my mother wants to know if I have another bag of soil for my father.
Hmmmm
I scoot down and bring him one more and come back inside for about 15 minutes when my mother call once more for more soil.
WTF
He is using my potting soil for his plants where he should be using topsoil, which is cheaper.
I went outside and told him that when I gave him yet ANOTHER bag.
My mother then called me and I went over for lunch and while we were sitting there my father asked me for some pots.
I told him I didn’t have any.
He said yes I did, there were about thirty of them under the stairs next to the freezer.
GRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!!!!
He watched my house while I was in New Zealand and must have catalogue everything I have that he wants to borrow.
Damn.
I gave him ten pots to shut him up.

My banana plant is doing great and has doubled in size.
I will be putting it into this huge 14-inch pot I have so that it can grow more roots faster.
I am determined to get it as big as that $400 one I saw for the price of five bucks.
Some of these plant places are sick in the head if they think I am dishing out that kind of money for a plant when I can buy a small one and grow it to that size.
I will end this post here because I will probably put up a Sex Talk.
The peanut gallery is calling for one.

HEY!!!!!!!! How did that get there?

Have a nice weekend

Walker