blue moon (2)

Thursday, March 15, 2007

Hit And Walk-er ©

I LOVE MORPHINE!!!!!!!!!!!!

Oops did I say that out loud?
You’ve had a number of drunken posts from me so I guess a stoned post is about due.
I would like to thank all of you for your comments, the phone calls and Ims.

The gastrocnemius (Calf muscle) that connects to the Achilles tendon is what I have managed to tear to shreds.
Nan you were close but I tore it from the other end.
I guess the popping I heard was that muscle snapping.
The doctor said 2-6 months for it to repair itself with physiotherapy and painkillers to ease the pain for now.
Pain killer my eye, brain killers is more like it, these things work so well you could shoot me and I wouldn’t feel it but ummmm you don’t have to shoot me to prove it, ok.

I’m no stranger to physio.
Over my life I have had to rebuild a broken part and one time a shattered body.
It’s almost like me and life butting heads together to see who is more stubborn.
I know in the long run I will loose but I will fight to make it in the long run.

I hopped into the doctor’s office and was greeted by Lola the doc’s sister/secretary.
She told me I should have gone to the hospital for x-rays.
I told her I didn’t need them because the leg wasn’t broken and I know what broken is as you will see further on.

I sat in the waiting room chatting it up with Lola and the daughter of some other patient that was in before me when Louis came out and I was ushered into the office.
He stood there laughing at me as I hopped into his office.
He’s lucky I like him, that’s all I’m saying.
I dropped into the chair and he asked me what happened and for the 100th time, I retold the story.

Mike stopped by because he had just gotten Internet at the new place but wanted both computers connected to the Internet at the same time as it is at my place and he also wanted a printer.
We went to Staples where we found him and all in one scanner printer fax machine on sale for $59 and then to his place, that was about 5 pm.
I hooked up a hub I brought from home and set up a network at his place but it didn’t work.
I know my stuff and it should have worked but stupid thing wasn’t working on the laptop but was on the desktop.
Mike was sitting there looking over my shoulder confused and drinking cognac
I gave up on the network after awhile and connected his new printer which was easy to do and sat down for a cognac and a beer chaser.
It was around 8:30 so we ordered a pizza for dinner.
When the pizza arrived we sat around eating drinking and just shooting the shit for a couple of hours when I remembered something.
You see, when I can’t figure something out it haunts me until I figure it out and the whole time I was talking to Mike I was still thinking about why the network wasn’t working.
I got up while he was talking and shut his modem off then started it again and 60 seconds later it came on and both computers were on line.
Stupid modem had to be cycled to see the other computer on the hub.
That was worth celebrating, another cognac and a beer.
Around 12:30 I got up to walk the three blocks home and left.
I stood at the crossroads lit up by 4 big lights and 4 light standards
When the light turned green I walked out and just 5 or so steps to the sidewalk this little dark car came shooting from around the turner behind me and was barrelling straight at me.
It’s not like I’m a small 250 pound man, I kinda stand out when in the headlights of a on coming vehicle but what I am not is a fucken deer and my body went into self preservation mode before I could think of it myself.
I was in mid stride when I saw the car and had planted my left foot to the ground and raised my right.
One more step forward and I would have been dead center of the car with no way of avoiding him and the car was showing NO effort to stop.
I tried to stop all forward movement and this put a lot of strain on my left leg, specifically the gastrocnemius and then on top of all the pressure of forcing my leg to stop my body's forward movement I was pushing back at the same time to propel me back and out of the way of the car adding more strain to the leg and POP!!!!!
Something had to give and the calf was it but not before it pushed me back a bit and with my hands outstretched, I hit the corner where the windshield meets the doorframe knocking me down.
The car just sped up the street while I lay there.
When I tried to get up I couldn’t move my leg at all and crawled to the sidewalk so that another moron didn’t come flying around the corner to finish me off.
I rolled onto the sidewalk and right into a damn puddle.
After a few minutes I tried standing up again and found I couldn’t get any weight on the left leg so using a fence I pulled myself up.
It took me close to 40 minutes to go the two blocks home hopping most of the way.
The next day I called doctor now here I am.
Louis stared at me in disbelief.
So I told him I was there to see what was wrong with my leg and my shoulder.
He asked if I hurt the shoulder when I fell to the ground.
I told him no, that I hurt the shoulder falling out backwards from a moving truck, which was greeted with a blank stare from Louis.
I told him to forget it; it was another long story.

He called the secretary to bring in my file and we waited there for Lola who walked in with the box that contained my medical history then he started going over it with me.

Broken hip 1967
Broken knee 1967
Broken left tibia 1967
Two broken ribs right side 1967
Broken rib left 1967
Broken right tibia 1969
The sixties were special
Broken wrists 1976
Cracked disks lower back 1981
Stab wound right thigh 1983
Cracked scull, concussion 1983
Poisoned, DOA 1984
Stab wound lower right side 1986
Cracked scull 1988
Broken ankle 1993
Dislocated shoulder 2007
And now
Torn gastrocnemius 2007

He got me to sit up on the table and looked at my leg and told me it was a good thing I had it tightly wrapped up because it was probably what kept the swelling down but that it was going to take a while before it would be ok.
On the way out of his office he asked me to look at his computer when I brought my mother in next week.
I told him I would, I have been fixing his computers for years.
I thanked Lola, said bye to the other woman still in the waiting room and went for the door when a man in his late 20 early thirties hopped in.

“Was it a little dark car with no brakes”?

Have a nice day

Walker

22 comments:

patti_cake said...

My goodness Walker all i'm saying is if we meet IRL I'll keep my distance! (kidding). Morphine makes me itch but Vicodan is the shit! Seriously I hope you feel better quickly. My poor toe is nothing compared to your torn muscle. Ouch!

Nan said...

Ahhh es, Morphine. It was my friend too.
Take care of that calf muscle and believe me it does take 6 months before it's back to normal. It does get much better after 2-3 weeks though. Advil really helped me with the swelling too.

Vickie said...

All I'm saying is I'm glad you saw the doctor and now I know who I lost the title of " an accident waiting to happen" to----it was you :) I would have kept it if I had known it was going to you sweetie.

One day we will both be free of the title---hmm wonder will we still be able to enjoy life---yea I know we will.

Fizzy said...

It can only happen to you!
I am sure you meant to say Beer with Cognac chasers

Teresa said...

You poor thing. I am sorry I am just now getting around the reading all of ths. Hope you are doing okay. Be sure and rest!! XOXOXO

itisi said...

I was wondering....do we still call you Walker or are you changing it to hoppy? hop-a-long?
hopper?

I told you that you would get good drugs!!

Manny said...

I have vicodin at my house. LOL

Followed you from Gab's.

Peace out

nachtwache said...

Wow, I see your not lonely ;) I guess it could have been worse; a lot of drivers shouldn't be allowed to drive! The lucky pedestrians are the ones that escape getting mowed down. Out west here we've had quite a few deaths from hit and runs. From children to seniors, tourists to cops. I walk a lot and always watch carefully for traffic, even so, I've had close calls. Take care, I hope you get spoiled.

Shaz said...

Take care Geez what a pin in the uh you know what!!!!

Health and prayers for a painless and quick recovery friend xxx

nachtwache said...

:D I just figured out how to access blogs and the comments from my Google site!!! Who says an old dog can't learn new tricks?
Now a pin in the you know what would be painful! But it might distract from the pain in the leg. Or it could be acupuncture.
Stay safe and happy.

Sally said...

Uh Oh WOW - I'm so sorry this happened to you. Please take good care and heal quickly.

Walker said...

patti_cake : I had to stop the pills because the were making my eyes dry and hurt. Weird eh.

Walker said...

nan: Its feeling a litle better now after a week but I won't get over confident. The doctor said It can get worse.
I don't want to even imagine what worse would be

Walker said...

Vickie: Ha ha ha funny lady.
I am not accident pron, other people are blond. :P

Walker said...

RFizzy: Yes yes only me, I just wish it was someone else LOL
Actually we have beer chasers and shoot the shots first.

Walker said...

Teresa : I am doing alot better than the day it happened.
The cats are starting to miss my crawling around on the floor lol

Walker said...

ItisI: You can call me Hop a long Walker LOL

Walker said...

Manny: I have scotch, its coctail hour LOL

Walker said...

nachtwache: We have our share of hit and runs. If these idiots would just stop theyt may save the person they hit rather than drive off and leave them there to die because they were found to late.

Walker said...

Shaz: Thank you, I wish the say to you to :)

Walker said...

nachtwache: WHO SAID YOU WERE OLD!?

Send them over here and I'll slap spme sense into them and then send them, to the eye doctor.
It never to late to learn something.

Walker said...

Sall: I will take care. HD will go bankrupt without me :)