blue moon (2)

Friday, May 05, 2006

IPOD Love PT3 ©

That smell…..it’s the same one I smelled at Archie’s place earlier today.

I woke up at 8 am for some reason and I decided to do a little cleaning and blog hopping, before I took my IPOD out for a walk.
Remember this is all about my IPOD not me.
I usually go in the opposite direction form Archie’s place because if I went by there first the walk would end right there.
I walk about 2 miles in a big circle and find myself passing by his place on the way home.
It’s a hangout for old Greeks and old drug dealers.
They only have Archie, cards, pot and beer in common.
It’s not my scene and I don’t gamble much but they like it when I stop by and toss them a couple of stories and listen to some of theirs.

It’s funny.
Someone asked me last night what my favorite time was and I told her 1860’s.
She asked me why?
I have always been a western fan and not so much for the violence or the horses but the thought of being free to just go.
Ride the country, taking in all the sites.
Avoiding Broke Back Mountain.
It’s the freedom I have always wanted.
Sometimes I feel like a caged animal and I get so fucken frustrated, I just want to fucken scream.
MrsLifecruiser you asked me how I got into drugs.
I was born into them
My parents didn’t to drugs but they were everywhere when I grew up.
My friends were rough and I was deep into the bowls of the underworld were money, drugs and sex was all we thought of, the perks of the trade of crime.
I wanted some freedom and to be different than everyone else.
I wanted some adventure.
I was 14-15 when I smoked my first joint and from there I started selling and then got bigger and bloodier over the years holding on to what’s yours.
Then you stop one day, look around and realize the people around you are all expendable, even you.
I don’t admit to being smart but I’m not stupid either.
In the 80’s the shit hit the fan and people were getting gunned down in the streets in one of the quietest cities in North America.
People were dead.
People that I knew as kids and played with, killed by men who were once kids and played with the same people they snuffed out.
All friends, mine to and one was the husband to my father’s god daughter.
When the news came of the killing, we were eating at the table at my parents place.
My father said, “How can someone get in so deep with these people”?
If he only knew who was sitting across from him.
That was the beginning of the end.
The end came to my door step one after noon in the form of an armed standoff with a rival group wanted in.
Seven of us in my fucken living room pointing guns at each other and my mother walks in to say hello.
Right down the gauntlet she wandered.
It was funny we all put our guns behind our backs pretending there was nothing happening.
I asked her to leave because we had some business to talk about.
When she gone the guns came out again but I had time to think while my mother was there.
All this wasn’t worth it.
We were sitting there later having a beer when Mad Dog came to me and said I was the craziest mother fucker he ever saw.
I had put my gun away and walked up to the other guy’s gun and dared him to shoot.
I had enough at that stage.
A week later I resigned from the life of drugs and cleared all my debts.
I burned my books freeing everyone that own me money of any debt and went out to try and find myself and someone to share a life with that didn’t think I was expendable, I’m still looking.
Some joined me and we are all still nuts but legal nuts as opposed to certifiable.
The ones that didn’t from my group are now all dead or in jail.
So all I ever wanted was to run free and I thought that life was it, but it wasn’t.
Maybe my freedom lies in these pages I write down periodically.

So when I walked into Archie’s the other day I saw four old men I know so well.
They were just like me when they were younger, looking for the freedom to run free and be happy.
I should ask them one day if they found it, but they look so happy hanging out together, maybe they have.
Maybe their freedom is being with their friends.


Hey kiddo, you still got those stupid things on you head.
It’s my IPOD
Sublime sloshing out “Summertime” through the earpieces.
You’re going to go brain dead.
Those things such everything out of you brain.

Yeah one big mind eraser
Like the joint your smoking at, what’s this 10:30 am and that beer you’re drinking doesn’t look like orange juice.
We were sitting around talking and all of a sudden this sweet aroma came into the room.
It just appeared out of nowhere.
It was like vanilla.
An angel is in the room comes from B.
What!?
Since when do you believe in god let alone angels.
I believe in god.
You’re a Nazi racist, who has "born to die" tattooed on your wrists!!!!
I bet Mien Kempt is you fucken bible to.
He’s right, it is an angel.
Shut up Archie.
It’s an angel.
Oh god let me win the lottery.
God doesn’t give you money Archie, only happiness.
Where the fuck is all this coming from?
How much did you guys smoke?
But I will be happy if I win the lottery.
NO Archie God doesn’t give money only peace.
Who the fuck are you and where is B?
Peace?
Peace I am going to get when I die, I want a 30 million dollars now.

ENOUGH!!!
I’m going home, you’re all nuts.


I hit the button and and and ……..fuck
The battery died on my IPOD.
So it was a silent walk home.


But now I am standing here at almost 8pm in the evening and there is that sweet smell again.
Vanilla
A breeze brushed past me and I felt good.

Angels?

Nah

OH, a friend found my blog and she has been reading it but is to shy to comment, so everyone wave to Mel.

Have a nice weekend

Walker

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