blue moon (2)

Friday, February 17, 2006

Big "Sigh" ©

Here we are another day another 24 hours to kill and only to start it all over again tomorrow.
How fucken insane is that.
Once we get past the formalities the whole day passes as the one before with maybe a few detours, nothing major to knock you off what life throws your way on a daily basis.
This morning for me started the same but instead of wearing a black pair of track pants I put on a set of grey ones.
But the cord on the grey ones is a foot and a half longer on one side than it is on the other and it’s driving me nuts.
So down the stairs I go in search of a pair of scissors.
Open the drawer and start looking.
Knife
Knife
Knife
Fork
Knife
Spoon
Spoon
Spoon
Fork
Knife
Knife
How is it when you are looking for something you never find it?
You would think that when I own 3 pairs of scissors I would be able to find them
And another thing
How come they are called a pair of scissors when there is only one?
Ok no scissors in the drawer.
Up to the washroom I go.
In the medicine cabinet, still nothing.
But I notice the lighter.
I pick it up and burn off the piece I want to get rid of and now I am happy.
I head off down stairs and sit in front of my brand new TV and put in The Hitchhikers Guide to The Galaxy.
I haven’t seen it yet.
I grab a coke and sit down to watch.
Lighting up a cigarette, I got into the movie.
It’s not that bad but it’s entertaining.
I did notice though that my cigarette smelled different, but I smoke reservation cigs so it could be that.
Half an hour into the movie and I noticed it was getting hot so I got up to take off the sweat shirt and was immediately in pain.
Yanking at my shirt I could see the smoke from my waist band.
Well it seems that the string I burnt off, wasn’t off and was slowing burning down like a fuse to the track pants and now the waist band was aglow. Them being made of cotton they just started adding fuel to the fire.
I’ll tell you this much, I have never peeled out of my pants faster than I did today.
I found myself standing at the kitchen sink with water running on my now in the garbage track pants.
I guess I am going shopping this weekend for a new set of track pants.
At least I know I can still light a fire down there.

I finished watching the movie and if not entertaining it did have an interesting question throughout the movie.
It was a simple question and an old question but the answer I found to be complicated.
The question:
What is the meaning of Life?
In the movie, the basic answer was being with someone that loves you and you love them.
But is that all it is?
With divorce at a record high and infidelity being the main cause, how can that be the answer?
Many people value love more than anything else.
Love of family
Love of your partner
Love of friends
Love of people
Love of animals
Many types of love
Respect is a main feature in this as well.
There can’t be true love without respect.
With all life’s cycles and the changes we always seem to be going through, how can we calculate what the meaning of life is?
I think love is a small piece of the meaning of life.
I think I have the answer for the question, at least for me that is.
It should be different for everyone.

There are many things going on in my mind at the moment.
I have my own problems to think of but no time to deal with it.
I have someone staying with me who just walked into her apartment in another country last week only to find her boyfriend hanging on the balcony dead.
She found herself alone with no one, no friends for support, so she came back to Canada for a month.
She needs an ear to talk too.
I have a person who has contacted me on line through my blog to tell me that her partner, now ex partner has left her.
She liked my Valentines Day post and that she believed in what I wrote. Then she went on to tell me she was thinking of killing herself, she is only 21.
She is still a baby with lots of life to live.
We have since sent 10-15 emails back and forth in the last 2 days but as long as I am still getting those emails I know she is alright.
So keep them coming please.

I personally think they may have found the wrong person to talk too especially at this point in my life, but I am willing to listen to anyone who needs an ear.
I do have 2 rather big ones.

For me the meaning of life is being true to your self, otherwise how can you be truthful to someone else?
People will hurt you but it’s not your fault and some people will make you happy, cherish that.
The day will come when there will only be happiness and life will be sweet.

I’m drained emotionally and physically.
I need to answer 4 emails and have a friend sitting in my chair waiting to have a talk.
So I’ll leave this right here and try and catch up to you all tomorrow.

Tell Me:

What is the meaning of life for you?


Walker

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