blue moon (2)

Thursday, October 13, 2005

Burp ©

I have seen it all and now I believe that we are a species of gluttons.
I've seen people eat more food than they should and I have been one of them. I have entered countless wing eating contests and beer drinking contest (not at the same time) than I can count.
I don’t mean bets between people.
These were actual contests where we ate heaps of food for stupid prizes.
For instance I know I have eaten more than 250 chicken wings in a sitting (this was before they started breeding chickens with buffalos).
I have eaten 8 ¼ Big Macs with fries and coke.
I’ve drunk 72 8 ounce glasses of beer with a shooter every 10.
That was a last man standing contest.
I pissed a river the next day.
And there was more, LOTS more.
In the last 8 years I have taken a new view on eating and health and have managed to loose 55 pounds.
Now lots of the times when I ate so much it was for a reason like the contests but I ate more than I should on a regular basis.
Today I was thinking about what someone told me, the other day.
There is a restaurant here now that serves a 96 ounce steak. It's a regular item on the menu. That’s 6 pounds of meat in one serving.
That’s 24 Big Macs worth.
If you eat it with all the fixings then your whole party gets their meal covered.
Who is gonna be the sacrificial lamb for this one?
That seems like alot of food for one person.
Hell thats alot of food for a family of 4.
I’m sitting here right now trying to figure out if I could ever eat one. Hmmmmm and I’m not stoned, so get that out of your minds.
So I decided to buzz the net and see what else I could find.
What I found was that we are pigs.
Shit we put pigs to shame.
Pigs would eat anything and so would we. Hell we eat the fucken pigs don’t we?
Look at this steak.
This is a 72 ounce steak.
I don’t know?
I may be able too.
But the one here is 24 more ounces bigger.
It seems that more has become the norm lately. Everywhere I look there are ads saying theirs are the biggest or longer than the other guy; we are talking food still you know.
Remeber when there was one patty on a burger.
Then came A&W and it's 2 patties.
Then Mc D's came with 2 to which A&W came with 3.
NOW Mc D's has 4.
When will it end?
Look at the hambergers served at this restaurant. I bet Lisa's boys would love to take a crack at these.
Mrhaney could eat one after a day working on the floor.
I watched someone on TV eat 100 hotdogs like it was a snack.
2 for 1 Pizza
10 Tacos for 7 bucks
All you can eat salad.
Huh what's that?
The only thing that never get's eaten salad.
Chinese Buffet. 100 Items, 10 bucks eat all you can. How can they make money?
Everytime I go I eat shirmp, scalaps, chicken. I don't fill up on the egg rolls or other fillers they put out there.
At the end of my meal I get my fortune cookie and crack it open. I says your going to die of gluttony and your lucky loto numbers are .......
I looked at some of the kids coming home from school the other day and most of them were big. 12 year old closing on 200 pounds. They don't have to take gym if they don't want to so they are out of shape. Out of shape as kids then they will become out of shape adults.
If we go to Wendy's for a dollar they supersize your order, that's only the fries and drink.
I don't know why they even ask, everyone says yes.
If we see more for less we go buy it.
It doesn't matter if it is good for us as long as we are getting more for our money.
Well I can't speak for anyone else but I need to loose 40 more pounds to feel better with myself. It's giving me a flat ass from sitting here writing posts every day.
I don't eat at any fast food restaurants if I can avoid it.
I still eat chicken wings but that's usually a pound and when I go watch football.
I drink alot less beer and alot more soda water.
And I feel better.
But still piss a river the next day.
There muist be something beer and soda water have in common. I just know it.
Eat healthy and if you can't, eat just enough.
Before I sign off here, I want to show you the ultimate party pizza.

Bon apetite


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