blue moon (2)

Saturday, May 28, 2005

Road Trip ©

Have you ever had the urge to go on a road trip?
Right out of the blue, LET’S GO!!!!
My friends and I were famous for just taking off to party in another city where the cops didn’t know us and we were not under surveillance. Don’t laugh, but Andy was pissing in the washroom and a cop was watching him through the window to see what he was up to, pervert.
It was a Friday night and Mike said, let’s go to Montreal and party.
I’m in, I said.
Andy was eager to get out and Philip had a car so he agreed.
Montreal was a 2 hr drive or 1 hr 20 minutes as the crow flies. So we flew at 120 miles an hour. Yes I said miles.
This was the mid eighties, so it was the end of Disco and the beginning of Rock again. There were heaps of clubs and venues to go to. They drank until 3am in the morning and the parties in the after hour clubs ROCKED.
The Limelight was the main target. 4 floors with 4 clubs. We went in and had some drinks and danced for a couple of hours. It was a great time for all.
Main thing was having an uninterrupted good time and getting laid if possible. The drugs flowed freely and everyone indulged. (No one remembered a lot of these parties)
We left the club at 3 am and we were all hungry, it may have something to do with all the pot we smoked. We ended up at this Chinese restaurant/after hours place.
It was called The Emerald Garden Restaurant.
Upon walking in, we all just froze. We hit the mother load. The place was filled with women. Not just any women but tall, longed legged, scantly clad Amazon women. A place filled with Zenas. This had the potential for a great ending to our road trip.
We found a table and ordered drinks and food.
The women were checking us out and sending us winks and smiles.
Gonna get fucked tonight, said Andy.
Looks that way, said Mike.
Philip was staring at every chick in the place, trying to find a target.
I was looking at the menu, I didn’t want any pussy until I had something to eat and that was final.
Andy picked up his drink and went and sat at the bar with this brunette with large tits and started chatting her up.
The rest of us waited for our food.
After eating, I sat back and enjoyed my beer.
Philip had moved off and went to sit with these 2 girls and try his luck. I sat there with Mike,talking and a couple of girls made us aware of their interest, but to be honest after eating I wasn’t up to it, plus I was tired and we still had to drive home. Mike was the same.
We’d let the boys get laid and I’d drive back. After a couple of beers I needed to go to the can(washroom). I go downstairs and walk into an empty washroom. I stepped up to the urinal and started peeing.
Just then the door opened and 2 ladies walked in. Both had to be 6ft 6, in their heels.
Now I was pretty sure that the sign on the door said MEN in French, HOMME, but now I was wondering.
They walked over to me and smiled. They each went on opposite sides of me.
They then pulled up their skirts, whipped out their cocks and started pissing.
FUCK THEY WERE MEN!!!!!!!!!!!!! surprise
I think I just stopped pissing. I didn’t finish, it just blocked off. I went upstairs and told Mike to go to the washroom.
I don’t have to go, he said.
Yes you do, I replied and off he went.
60 seconds later Mike was peeling up the stairs and to the table.
Right, he said, we’re out of here.
Where’s Philip and Andy.
I looked at him with a grin and said, Philip is at the table there and Andy is at the bar.
He looks at Philip and he was still talking with the 2 girls and then he looks at Andy he was necking with the err…girl at the bar.
I went to get Philip and Mike got Andy.
Andy was screaming when Mike said we were leaving,until Mike whispered something to him and I swear his face went florescent white. He glowed in the dark. We paid up and left.
All the women in that place that night were transvestites. They were all men, not a single woman, in the place but the waitresses.
It also explains when we first went in, the waitress asked us, are you sure you are at the right place.
Well obviously we weren’t.
All the way home, Andy was spitting out the window.
He made us all swear, not to tell anyone.
Andy became homophobic from that day on.

Here is a Joke .
I will include one in every Fridays post from now on, so that you could all start you weekend on a laugh.

Apples and Wine!

Women are like apples on trees.
The best ones are at the top of the tree.
Most men don't want to reach for the good ones because they are
afraid of falling and getting hurt.
Instead, they just take the rotten
apples from the ground that aren't as good, but easy.......
The apples sat on the top thinking something is wrong with them, when in reality, they're amazing.
They just have to wait for the right man to come along. The one who's brave enough to climb all the way to the top of the tree.
Now, men..., men are like a fine wine.
They begin as grapes, and it's up to women to stomp the shit out of them until they turn into something acceptable to have dinner with.

Have a nice weekend.


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