blue moon (2)

Tuesday, April 05, 2005

A Lazy Day ©

Today is a lazy day .My guest is arguing with herself. Should she go out shopping by her self or wait until tomorrow when I go out and she gets a drive?
I don’t mind driving her tomorrow but I’m not budging today. I’m staying put. I have over 700 movies in the rack and might even play some backgammon.
I WANT A LAZY DAY. You can’t get into trouble at home right? Wrong.
A number of years ago, I was sitting on my couch having a lazy day doing nothing and watching TV, or at least my eyes were pointed at it. I remember it was in the summer and it was a hot day. I bent over to get a smoke and all of a sudden my house filled with police and there were a couple of guns pointed at my head. I sit back and put a smoke in my mouth and stretch out my arm and say, does anyone want a smoke.
I think to myself, Fuck they caught me getting free cable. It’s the cable police, I’m screwed now. All that I have gotten away with and it’s the cable guy that gets me.
They grab me and cuff me and tell me, you’re under arrest for sexual assault. I freak. WHAT? But I don’t get the Playboy Channel. None the less I’m being dragged out of the house, cuffed, in front of my neighbors and parents, who live next door.
As I am being lead away to the cruiser a voice from the crowd yells, NO NO not him, that one. We all look into the direction of the voice and it’s my next door neighbor and she is pointing at her landlord.
Apparently she is moving and the landlord stopped by to show the apartment to possible new tenants without calling her. She was in the shower when he brought in the couple to show them the washroom.
He didn’t say excuse me all he said to her was I’m just showing these people the bathroom we won’t be long.
Landlord and not going to rent this place prospective tenants run.
Girl picks up the phone and calls police. Screams Masher.
Police arrive.
Run into my house.
Point guns at my head.
Me in cuffs.
What a Lazy Day that was.
I’m going for a walk.
See y’all tomorrow

BTW since it wasn’t the cable police well you know “wink” ”wink”


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