blue moon (2)

Tuesday, March 30, 2010

Post Birthday ©

Another birthday gone and I am only half paralyzed.
Not bad, I guess.
As I have gotten older things have/had to change.
When I was younger I’d go out for a good time.
It was usually a quiet dinner by myself and then out to meet friends, maybe hunt me down a nice cuddly pair of tits or two to snuggle up to for the night but, as I got older, I started getting a little slower.
Fucken out of shape too.
I used to party for days, weeks on end but today, I chase a cab ten feet and pass out on the bench half way there.
Then wake up with my shoes missing.

30 years ago my friends and a couple of family members were a major part of my life.
Most of us had grown up together and were like family.
Growing up on the streets watching each other’s back created a bond between us all that’s been strong for all these years.
We all ate at each other’s parents place.
Most spoke three of four languages because of that.
I spoke Greek, Italian, English, Yugoslavian and some French by the time I was ten.
My parents were having problems understanding English, just think how fucked up they were when they send their kid to school to learn English and he comes backs speaking Italian instead.

Many of us went to jail together.
None of us were ever organized but when one of us had an idea the rest went to jail with him, HA HA HA
Ah hell, what the fuck are friends for if not to get in trouble with.
That’s how our parents got to know each other so well.
From bailing us all out all the time.
They’d meet in court and sitting the crowd waiting.
You could tell they were talking about us.

My father: “Tha sou gamiso to hristo get tin panagia (I’m going to fuck your Christ and his mother)”.
I could never understand why Greeks swear like they do.
Maybe they spent to much time with the sheep, who knows?
Fuck my Christ and his mother.
What kind of a fucken threat is that, I have Christ, and his mother?
May explain why all the food in the fridge disappears so fast.

Fuck my Christ and his mother, hmmm
Well if it means me getting fucked then, they’re yours, what can I say.

Buddy’s father: “Porka Madonna, Sto andando scoparlo voi piccola scopata della figlio voi” The holy mother is a whore and he is going to fuck the little whore that she gave birth too.
WTF is that?
I never had Chinese friends Growing up but if I did, I bet their fathers would be in court swearing. “I’m going to fuck Budda’s Momma “.

It’s almost like our parents only got laid when we fucked up and Mary, mother of Christ is what their woodies desired.
Except the Greeks, they fuck em both then go to church on Sunday to give a donation.
At least they got us out of jail.

The years have taken their toll on the old crew.
Some of us still see each other on a regular basis but there are only a handful left and each year the number gets smaller.
It looks like a scene from the Sopranos when we all hook up.
We sit and reminisce about some of the shit we got away with or an adventure that went totally fucken wrong then worse only to finish perfectly as planned. HA HA HA

Why I didn’t end up spending half my life in jail or in a fucken grave I have no fucken idea.
Lucky, I guess.

I remember when buddy showed up with Julio Iglesias limo once.
It seems he had just stolen it from the venue he was performing at.
Half of the fucken car was in the laneway and the other half was in the middle of the bloody street because it was so long.
He grabbed some beers and some hash then took off to pick up a couple of chicks he said.
I told him there was like, two limos in the whole city so I didn’t know how long he would last driving the thing around before the cops caught up with him.
He told me not to worry and took off.

The next morning I went across the street for some smokes and the news paper and as I was reading it on the way back the front page has this piece about a car chase that went through two provinces then ended up with a man driving a stolen limo launching it and himself off the end of a pier and into a lake.
He was last seen swimming off into the sunset from the sinking ship before it to disappeared into the darkness.

Our kids cringe when they hear some of the things we got into.

Women have always been a major part of my life for some reason.
Never really had to chase a woman.
One of my mentors in life once told me, never chase a skirt because you might catch it and if you did, you wouldn’t know what to do with it but if you sit there quietly on the bench the little bird will fly over to see if your friendly.

The guy was 79 when he died with his cock dripping cum out of his 29-year-old girl’s mouth so he must have known something.
You listen and learn to your elders they say so I figure if you ignore them long enough, eventually they will come over wondering why you’re ignoring them.
Beats going out there and making a monkey out of myself or spending piles of fucken money like some of my friends do.
Cheaper to pay a fucken hooker sometimes if they added it all up, it would also help if they went after someone closer to their age and not 40 fucken years younger.
I had a 20-year-old last year tell me she could make my pulse race and blow my mind away.
I laughed at her then told her my EX has been doing it for 30 years.
Every time she opens her mouth she drives me nuts and want to shoot myself in the head.
One of my biggest regrets is not having fucked her up the ass, dry.
Just once to cover the ass fucking I’ve gotten over the last twenty years.

This I what I do after my birthday, I reflect on bits and pieces of the past.

Every year it gets harder and rougher.
But I push on.
Every day is a new day with it’s own trials and tribulations.
And I look for the answers
There will always be pain
I will fight through it
And also love
If you seek and accept it

Looking back on the whole shit pile, it reeks but it’s my stink and I enjoyed crapping it all out but not all of it was that bad.
When I was about 3 I got my first hard on when I shoved a butter knife into a live wall socket.
Ok maybe that was bad.

At the age of 8 my mother caught me practicing how to open bras with one of hers strapped to the radiator.
I’m still trying to figure it out 40 years later.
Come on someone; make a fucken remote for fucks sake.

Screwed my French teacher when I was 15
Failed French that year too, hmmm
Long story

Dated a cop once.
Another long story
We broke up because she always wanted to cuff me and I never knew if she was on duty or not.

Most of you know about the nun.

I coached a bunch of 5-7 year old hockey players once.
One of my favorite memories.
I had this little fat kid who couldn’t skate for shit.
All he did was fall down so we made him the goalie and he lay down inform of the net the whole time with his stick stretched out for the other player to trip over.
There wasn’t a single kid out there who could raise the puck off of the ice anyway.

I refereed a few ball hockey tournaments.
There was one team that was so broke they couldn’t afford goalie pads so their goalie duct taped the cushions from his couch around his legs.
I kid you not.
It was fucken virtually impossible to score on the guy because the cushions blocked the whole goal
The next year it had to be printed out in the rules clearly that ONLY, goalie equipment was allowed.

There’s more, heaps more, the good, the bad, the ugly and the chicks with the big tits of course.

Ah well until next year then.
Oh, would you like to see what I got for my Birthday?
Follow me but let me warn you that people shop according to my personality.

First and my favorite, not that I didn't love it all but I am a proud Canadian and just love watching our Canadian teams play hockey and win of course.
This is an official Winter Olympics hockey jersey, complete with fight strap to hold my pants up.

I got this great zippo lighter.
It's one of my favorite lighters and have owned one for as long as I could remember.
My last one broke during the summer and was very happy to find this one wrapped up on the coffee table in the morning.

I got this real cool pendant carved out of water buffalo horn.
As you can see it has a wolf on the top and a Celtic symbol on the bottom.
I water buffalo horn from Thailand with a carving of a North American wolf and a Celtic symbol.
I'd say it's a small world wouldn't you?
Eagles and wolves are the two animals I associate with the most.
On the jersey above, in the center of the maple leaf you will find twin eagles.
I have always been a lone wolf but free as an eagle until the time comes and the pack needs me.

I love Sci-fi.
I am a Trekkie and have seen the original series over a thousand times and still watch if it's on but I do watch other series as I am also a HUGE Stargate fan.
Over the years I have accumulated hundreds of vhs and dvds of movies and box series which i enjoy watching with friends and family.
I think it's up to 1500 in total so far, half of which are sci-fi and still growing with this next item I got.
I started collecting Farscape episodes, specifically the Starburst edition which are not fucken easy to find.
So far i managed to get my hands on almost all of it but for the last season which is in three box sets.
4.2 brings me one set closer and two away from completing it and when I find 4.1 and 4.3, and I will, I will sit one weekend and enjoy the whole thing without any damn commercials or "To be continued" at the end of an episode.

Doctor Who is next.

The next item, well.........OK I like hats.
I have about 120 of them upstairs in their own dresser that I have accumulated over the years from the places i have been to or places friends have gone and brought me one back.
I have worn some of them but most are for souvenirs like my Broncos back to back championship cap and my X-files cap.
Reminders of a piece of history.
This one though.......Every time I look at it I feel like I should have my pants pulls down to my knees for some reason.
Shiney gold thread on black.
Love the eagles on the front.
I could wear it at least once.
Around the house......

I am who I am and I guess......ok.......HA HA HA!!!!!!!!!!!
That's what went through my mind when I opened this one up.
I guess I can use it to make a broach or something, pendant to wear around my neack maybe.
Where's Inia, If I can';t find her, Frick you up next.

So that is what Walker done, did and got for his birthday.
51 years old.
A little slower but just as hungry for pussy as ever, if not more.
Life is crazy and I love every minute of it.
Good and bad and in the end, when the cake was all gone and the lights were down, I was snuggling up to a cozy set of tits.
Why change a good thing.

Have a nice day


sniff sniff

Where did I put that lighter?


BikerCandy said...

Wow, I'm first! Happy Belated Birthday. Looks like you raked in the goodies.

Walker said...

BikerCandy: THanks, yes I did even though i said NO GIFTS to everyone.
No one listens to me any more

Just telling it like it is said...

That is the first time I have seen a clone like that...but you know I wouldn't mind being the model...Happy Birthday BFF

Anonymous said...

All those aches and pains show that you've lived life, not just been a spectator. Here's to more of them! :)

Walker said...

Just telling it like it is: Thank you , I am sure you would make a great model

Walker said...

Skye: Wishing me more pain.....Ummm thanks, I think. lol

Joanna Cake said...

Belated Birthday Greetings Earthman! I loved FarScape too. We are just about to see the first episode of Dr Who's latest incarnation, Matt Smith. He has a helluva job on his hands trying to follow David Tennant. However, he has a secret weapon - Steven Moffat is now the main writer and he was responsible for the three award winning scary episodes of David Tennant's tenure. I have high hopes :)

BlazngScarlet said...

Quite an array of presents.
Somehow, I think the tits were your most favorite.
I could be wrong, but somehow I think not. :D


Walker said...

Joanna Cake: I have seen over 100 episodes of Dr Who over the year and I must say I enjoyed watching David Tennant as the Doctor.
We shall see how the new one does.
I have now completed the Farscape collection and will soon be watching that.

Walker said...

BlazngScarlet: The tits are always my favorite but with that jersey on i get alot more body checks ;)

Heff said...

Ain't nothin' wrong with a good dump, even though it DOES stink.

For the record, I like THIS background MUCH better.

And Holy Shit ! Bob & Doug McKenzie ?!??! I haven't heard those names since that 80's "Take Off To The Great White North" shit !

P.S. I love Geddy Lee...


Boxer said...

Fellow Aries! Happy Birthday! (belated) xoxox.

Peter said...

Better late than never... HAPPY BIRTHDAY

Lora_3 said...

Happy Birthday!

Be safe...