blue moon (2)

Wednesday, December 31, 2008

Bye Bye 2008, Hello 2009 ©

It’s December 31, New Years Eve and in 24 hours another year will be gone and a new one ushered in.
Much has happened here in Walkersville this last year a lot of which I did not share here because what is there you can do?

A lot of BS has come at me at high velocity and I stood my ground even when I looked like shit and my soul was battered but there is just no place or way to yield when you are being attacked from all sides.
Who do you surrender to when there are different enemies at all around you looking for their own piece of flesh?

This afternoon I was planning the poker game for the boys and me when the phone rang.
It was my EX telling me she was throwing up my seventeen year old so she could rent out her room to her boyfriend.
For seventeen years she held this kid close to her as long as she was being paid by welfare to keep her but now that she isn’t she has decided the kid should be on the street so she can bring in a man into her house.
She didn’t throw out the eldest because she works and has money she can suck out of.

She told m e if I wanted to go get her I could but she didn’t care either way because she was gone out the door before the morning when her boyfriend was moving in.
So I hung up the phone and got dressed to go pick her up and called first before I left.
When I pulled up to their house I was told that she had ran off when she heard she was to be put out so I packed the EX in the car and took off in the direction of where my oldest works.

My kids have never been apart.
When I was fighting for custody I was offered to have the youngest while the eldest go with the EX but I chose that I would rather loose both than have them torn apart.
Loose I did and for 8 ½ years I didn’t see them because the EX took off to Alberta and 2000 kms away from me.
Eight years she spent teaching the kids how much of a dangerous man I was and why they had to run away from me.

Today after years of dragging my name through the dirt I listened to my EX tell her that how much better it would be that she live with me.
It’s like teaching your kids that lions are bad then give them one for Christmas.

The whole drive all the EX could do was try and justify her reasons to me by saying the kid doesn’t go to school and how unruly she is.
How she steals from her and her sister.

Half way to my destination I spotted her walking on the opposite side of the street towards where I thought she was going.
It’s a two mile walk to the mall from her place and it was –20 but I decided to let her go instead of making a U-Turn to pick her up.
The walk would have cooled her down a bit I figured.

I drove around the mall parking lot looking for a spot while the EX rattled off he rhetoric not that I was listening, I was to busy trying to figure out what needed to be done.
It was obvious to me that the kid was coming here and not living on the street, her cousin was murdered not to long ago by a nut and my kids wasn’t going to become a statistic.

After finding a spot we went in to make sure my oldest was still there but wasn’t told why her mother showed up unexpectedly.
Then we went for a walk because I didn’t want my youngest seeing us then hiding so we wouldn’t see her.
It didn’t take long to find her on our return trip sitting outside the store on the floor waiting for her sister to finish work.

I got her to stand up, she brushed her mothers hand off of her shoulder when she went to help her and I told her to leave her alone and she will come on her own
We sat at a table and when my EX went to get some drinks I had a quick talk with her before her mother returned.

I told her it was a done deal and her mother wanted her out but she was to stay with me instead of a snow bank.
I explained that we would find a way to make it work because we were family and on my side we don’t leave our own to fend for themselves but she would have to live by certain rules.
She seems complacent, not that she had much fucken choice.

When my eldest got off of work we had the longest short quietest drive ever.
You could have heard a fucken fly fart it was so quiet.
I drove them home and we all went upstairs to talk and to get my youngest things.
Both girls disappeared into one bedroom for a while and their mother went in later then came out and said they were both in there crying.

My oldest is terrified of me and hasn’t spoken to me directly for years but I still went in there to talk to them.
They were both on the bed crying and I asked the oldest one what she wanted me to do.
Her mother was throwing the younger one out and I couldn’t leave her on the street and she said they can both stay in the one bedroom.
Yes they could but her mother said no because they fight with her boyfriend all the time.

You see I have to keep a certain distance from this bullshit because if I get mad I don’t want to do something like smack someone then get into trouble.
I told her it was her mother’s place and she decides who lives there and not me.
It didn’t help she kept on crying.
These two have never been apart and have gone through some tough times together because of my EX.
It’s easy for me to get mad here but I can’t afford it.

After an hour of humming and haing I took half her stuff to the car which filled it and told the EX I would be back for the rest next week then took off for home.
The whole way I did my best to reassure the kid that it won’t be that bad for the both of us and we will make it work, one way or another.

We got home and we started unloading the car and bringing everything up to her old room and I told her she can do what she likes in it and I would remove what she didn’t want.
I helped set up her computer on my network so she could still have a link to her friends and her sister.
It was about this time the phone rang and it was my mother telling me her sister called crying and I told her to call her sister.
It seems after I left the boyfriend showed up and sat in the living room with my EX smoking dope.
They never did it in front of the kids before but on the balcony but now it was ok I guess with the seventeen year old gone.

What can I say to that.
As a smoker I never smoked in front of anyone one that wasn’t old enough or anyone who didn’t smoke unless they didn’t have any objections and definitely not in front of my kids.
My oldest told her that she was going to look for an apartment and they can both move into it.
I won’t let that happen.
The oldest barely makes enough to pay the rent so how is she going to take care of the both of them.

Tomorrow she is coming down here after work and will be staying at my mothers for the night.
That’s where my youngest is sleeping for the next two days until I am done with the guys tonight and I can fix her room for her.
I will tell my oldest she can move in here with me, or my parents if living at her mother’s is to much of a problem.
I can’t have her move on her own in some place where she doesn’t know anyone.

So this is how I am ending this year.
What will next year bring, I don’t know.
I guess you’ll have to tune in and find out.
As for my EX, Bitch.

To all of you I wish all the best in the up coming year

Happy New Year!!!!!!!!!

Walker

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19 comments:

Rainbow dreams said...

wow what an end to your year, am kind of pleased you get to be with your kids again and them see you for who you are though...there comes a time when we can make up our own minds about people no matter what we have been told by others.
All the best for the New Year, Katie,x

Leah said...

You just cut right through the bullshit and you're there for them, even though it's been rough to be thought of as the "wrong" one all these years, you're just so much the grown up in this situation. I'm impressed. And also a little teary-eyed.

Best, best to you for 2009, you soulful dude.

Scarlet said...

It's time for your girls to 'meet' their Dad and find out for themselves what we here already know .... you're simply amazing.
No BS, tell it like it is and give everything you have.

I wish you AND your girls nothing but love, peace, happiness and health Walker.

Much love to you dollface ...
*muah*

Monogram Queen said...

You are a good Father, and I am so so sorry those girls have such a monster for a Mother.
I can't IMAGINE throwing your own CHILD out your home. It's so - so foreign to me, I just can't process it.
I have told my husband that there is NOTHING Madison could do that would make me turn my back on her. My love is unconditional.
I pray that everything will work out as it should and your sanity and health stay intact honey.
Happy New Year.

Megan said...

It's posts like these that make me bless my boots I don't have an ex to deal with.

Best wishes to you and your girls, Walker. Hope you win at poker!

xo

Bennu said...

Now they will get a chance to really know you, whether they live with you or not. You were there when they needed you and that is what counts... Happy New Year, hope it starts off better than this one ended.
xo

PBS said...

NOT a good way to end the year, for sure. But I hope this will turn into something good and give you the chance to get to know each other better. Speaking of better...2009 has GOT to be better than this year! Happy New Year to you!

Bud said...

Been through a very similar situation with my son. All I can say is that he's way better off for it. I hope this works out the same for both of you. Happy New Year, Walker.

Sally said...

I'm just stopping in real quick to wish you a good new year, Walker. Will be back tomorrow to read this post as I have Hunter tonight and she thinks it's okay to stay up until midnight; I don't think so little sister. :)

Puss-in-Boots said...

Those poor girls... I do feel for them. How a mother could throw her child out is beyond my comprehension. Thank goodness you were there to pick up the pieces, Walker. This will be a good chance to build bridges in the relationship with your daughters, especially as the Ex has poisoned them against you.

As for your Ex, words fail me and...enough said.

All the very best with the girls, Walker, and I hope you enjoy New Year with your buddies.

Romany Angel said...

Like most everyone else I am gobsmacked that your ex could even contemplate throwing her own daughter out and especially with nowhere to go and in freezing cold conditions. What kind of a parent does that?


She has been using and abusing those kids for her own gain their whole lives and now she has no use for the youngest, she gets the shaft in favour of her boyfriend. She doesn't deserve to have them call her Mum.


I hope this works out for you and the girls and gives you the chance to really know each other. I would particularly like to see your eldest no longer be afraid of you. Jesus your ex has done a number on that poor kid hasn't she?


I despise women who use their kids as weapons.


I hope you have a great night Walker and at least your girls are safe and warm with their grandparents. Happy New year.

deni said...

Wow, Walker, this is going to be a tough year for you, but also the Best in having your kids.

Happy New Year!

craziequeen said...

You have done the right thing, Walker. That house is not a healthy environment for your two daughters, but they are of an age when they have their own minds to make up. With the help of Dad and Grandma, the girls should be able to make the right decisions.

Here's to a happy and healthy 2009 for the newly extended Walker family!

[big hugs, Walker dude!]

cq

INNER VOICES said...

you are the fucking man... fuck yeah.... i moved out of the house at thirteen and its a long ass road to get on.. im glad you are there for your kids no matter what... and i'll be here for ya in 09 man...

*walks off pumping fist in the air shouting, "walker is the fucking man!"*

Just telling it like it is said...

Well at least you will have some time with them and they can get to know you not the person the bitch said you were!!!

Happy New Year!!!!

Rain said...

Happy New Year!!!

(((hugs)))

Sally said...

Well, now that I've read, I really don't know what to say although that is a lot that I'd like to. I will say this; I've known mothers before who have forsaken their children to have a man in their life. I've never understood it, and can't even imagine.

I'll be hoping for the best; your two daughters and you. This, in the end, maybe needed to happen.

Peter said...

Do you use the expression "You must have killed a chinaman" to explain bad luck in Canada? well I think I've figured out what happened to the Ming Dynasty!!!

BikerCandy said...

Happy New Year! I am hoping this is actually the beginning of a great new year for you and your girls. I really think they would be so much better off with you and I'm just an outsider looking in.