blue moon (2)

Friday, October 24, 2008

Fresh Air ©

What to post about?
How about……………..no, you’re not ready for that.
Maybe………no, I’m not ready for that.
I know……..no, no one’s ready for that.
I should post about Blogger being a real fucker today and wouldn't let me leave comments most of the day anywhere.

I did go out of the house today.
Yeah I was starting to feel a lot of love from my friends and thought that to be a little suspicious since some of them hardly ever come here and all of a sudden, I’m like their favorite person in the world.

So I decided to beat them to the draw today and beat it up the street for their usual hangout at Archie’s.
Besides its been almost a couple of weeks since I was last up there and a little fresh air don’t hurt none unless of course it’s in a metal tank and you forgot to wear your steal toe running shoes.
I hated steal toe boots and always got the steal toe running shoes.
They came in handy in a fight too especially when you kick someone in the side of the head, out like a light first shot.

You ever kick someone in the head?
You get this really cool feeling, like, wow I actually kicked a guy in the head without splitting my pants.

Of course there are those embarrassing times to when you’re like that little engine that could and think you could kick a 6ft 8in tall guy in the head and think you could and think you could but forget that you can’t spread your legs wider than the toilet seat and find yourself laying on your butt with Godzilla looking down on you with a big fucken grin on his face.

NEVER kick a guy in the balls with steal toe running shoes.
I did that once.
It was scary.
Frightening in fact.
I fell to the ground next to him and we cried together.

I mean he was a drunken crazed manic throwing rights, lefts, chair,s tables, bottles, all over the place and I only got one opening so I put my best field goal kick out there and went for the uprights to scored a three pointer.

It was horrible.
His right eye froze straight ahead but his left.
I still get shivers thinking how his left eye twisted grotesquely upward and disappeared behind his head.

Yeah the fresh air would do me good.

It’s starting to get a little cold outside now even with the sun out in full force I could feel it through my hoodie.
It took me ten minutes to get up there and the only one there was Archie so I sat in t he kitchen with him and listened to his whining about no one coming by to see him and how no one likes him any more.

He gave me a dirty look and I told him I was sick and didn’t want to make him ill to but those other bastards had no excuse for abandoning him like they did.
He slapped the tabletop and agreed with me then pulled out a bottle of Metaxa.
We talked for about an hour when I saw Tom walking up the street and I called out to him.
Archie gave me a dirty look.
I didn’t know why, him and Tom have been friends for 40 years almost.

Tom walked up and greeted us both then took a seat.
I asked him what he was up to and he said that he just finished work and was on his way home.
I then asked him why he hadn’t been by Archie’s all week and he said because Archie through everyone out last Friday when he got drunk.

It seems last Friday they were playing cards and drinking a case of wine when Archie lost hand after hand and he went crazy and smashed everything in sight and told everyone to get out and never come back again.
So they have been coming to my place instead.
Hmmmm

I looked at Archie and he was trying not to look at me.
I asked him if he was finally going nuts?
He said he quite drinking.
I pointed to the beer in front of him and asked what that was.
He said it was the last one.

I looked at Tom and told him they shouldn’t play for money then asked him how much money they won.
He said two bucks.
Two bucks?!
I just looked at Archie.
Didn’t say a word.
I picked up my shades and walked home.
Two bucks………….fucken old grumpy bastards

When I got home I picked up a bit around the house then decided to go next door and see what my parents were up too.
I walked through the back door and I could smell fresh cookies in the air.
I turned around and look for my father’s car but it was there.
I was shocked to say the least, my mother making more cookies and no yelling from my father emitting from the house.
Maybe he took the Jeep.
I walk through the back door and my father was sitting quietly in his chair while my mother was perched next to the stove staring at her cookies through the glass.

My mother must have baked 1000 cookies this last week and she freezes them after but my father usually freaks out about all the electricity and other BS someone with nothing to do complains about yet here he was quietly sitting there like nothing is happening.

I sat down and tossed out a few small questions like, how’s it going and then I had to ask why she was making more cookies.
This is where my father jumps in and says something like, “Because your mother likes to waste hydro”. But he said nothing.
My mother said she didn’t have any more of these particular cookies.

Hmmmm
There was something fishy going on here and no one was saying anything.
My mother offered me an almond cookie with icing sugar all over it and it was still warm.
How could I not say yes?
I ate the cookie then took a paper towel to wipe my hands then opened the cupboard door to throw it out and I saw a bunch of glass in the garbage.
I asked my mother what that was and she gave my father a stern look and said, ”Your father dropped my good crystal decanter today”.
Ah yes, I knew there had to be a reason he was quiet.

So that was my day, short, sweet and I got some fresh air too without breaking a toe.

Have a nice weekend.

Walker

30 comments:

Monogram Queen said...

Whoah i'm first! Go me!
I am drooling over those cookies. Can I beg your Momma to send me some Christmas cookies this year? I suck at baking. My Mom always makes nutty cookies & stuff I don't like. Give me an almond cookie with sugar any day ;)
Okay enough cookie orgasms here.

I am glad you are feeling better and getting out in the fresh air!
Stacy wears the steel toed tennies also! I laughed (sorry) at you lying down and crying with the guy you kicked in the nads. I guess it's hard for a woman to appreciate the horror since we don't have such appendages.
Wow i'm long-winded this morning!

PBS said...

Cookies from your mama--were these the aforementioned special cookies? Now I'm wondering about the posts you didn't do, the "How about……………" the "Maybe………" and the "I know…….."!

Fire Byrd said...

weirdly when my son got his head kicked the other week he enjoyed it, it felt like a right of passage to him, as he now knew what it felt like.
Testosterone has a lot to answer !
Enjoy your weekend cookies which no doubt your mum will cook since your dad is in the dog house!

Sally said...

Now we know why "Dad" was quiet. hahaha

Fresh air is good - we took Hunter to the park yesterday and had fun with her - I rode the carousel and she thought that was so funny.

I hope you have a good weekend, Walker.

Puss-in-Boots said...

I like your Mama the more I read about her. She's a woman after my own heart...

As for the family jewels being attacked in such a manner...makes my eyes water just to think about it...thank God I don't have any.

Glad you're feeling better, Walker. Pity you didn't cheer Archie up, tell him it's time to stop drinking...smirk.

Gypsy said...

Yep my mouth is salivating at the thought of those cookies too.

I'm very happy to hear you're feeling a lot better and a walk in the fresh air always does a body the world of good.

There have been a few men in my life I would have liked to kick in the gonads but when it actually comes down to it I don't think I could do it. *Cringe*

Peter said...

Hey Walker you better take your temperature and have a lie down, that day sounded pretty normal... not at all like your usual bedlam.

A.B. said...

aahahahahah - I love that your Father has got nothing to say about cookies because he's in the dog house. Sorry about the nice decanter, however.

Megan said...

Did you leave Tom there alone with Archie? Aren't you a bit worried about what may happen?

Just telling it like it is said...

And that my dear is why all men should wear a cup all the time...or should they wear it to make their package appear to be larger than life..either way a good selling point ;)

phoenix said...

hehehe Your day was much more interesting than mine! Fresh baked cookies now has me craving sweets and at 2am that is not a good thing LOL!

nachtwache said...

Ach ja; I miss my mom's Christmas baking!
Christmas is coming soon and if you or your dad didn't know what to get your mom, now you have something you could get her, since her old one just got broken :)

Lindy said...

A nice normal day? Better watch out for the madness thats coming the rest of the week. My mama is in Fl. baking cookies. Don't you feel bad for me?

Scarlet said...

I'm telling you .... your Mother ROCKS!

Poor Dad .....

lol

ssgreylord said...

i love the way your life unfolds. and the way you share it, well, i feel like i'm watching it all "live." brilliant!

Walker said...

Monogram Queen: You may be drooling over the cookies but I;m droolingwhile standing over the scales LOL

Walker said...

PBS: My mother makes 5-6 didfferent types but the almon butter cookies are leathal for many reasons lol

Walker said...

Fire Byrd: Sometimes pain gives you that sense of being alive.
Its hard to explain unless you have been in battle.

Walker said...

Sally: My father was sulking all nighty because he couldn't complain and you know he never screws up so this stuck to his craw a bit LOL

Walker said...

Puss-in-Boots: I'm gl;ad I feel better and being kicked down u nder doesn't give you an aussie accent either LOL

Walker said...

Gypsy: If you could taste them yopu would have a river pouring out of your mouth.
There is NOTHING nutricious about these cookies LOL

Walker said...

Peter: SAcary isn't it LOL
I have not time to sit down everyone has me on the go go go

Walker said...

A.B.: Its someplace my father doesn;t find himself in but he hates it when he is

Walker said...

Megan: One less friend is more quiet for me LOL

Walker said...

Just telling it like it is: Your kick first ;)

Walker said...

phoenix : 2 am is the best time to be eating cookies I do it all the time.
Well that's not true I just eat cookies ALL the time ha ha ha

Walker said...

nachtwache : My mother has many more decanters but i think she more pleased that she has my father over the barrel more than loosing the decanter

Walker said...

Lindy: No I don't because I know you;re on a diet :)

Walker said...

Scarlet: My mother has her ways and she isn't shy to explore them ;)

Walker said...

ssgreylord: I'm happy you enjoy me post.
I just write it down as life is chasing me down the street.
Usually with sirens blaring LOL