blue moon (2)

Tuesday, February 26, 2008

WOP ©

WOP… WOP… WOP… WOP… WOP… WOP… WOP… WOP…

No, this not an anti Italian protest post, it’s the sound the blades of my new fan as it goes around and around.

Why is it everything has to be bigger now but the cars to bring them home with?
When I was a kid, they used to have these HUGE twenty-five foot long cars in the sixties and seventies now they look more like five to six feet long.
The fans back then had six-inch sharp steel blades and the first ones had no covering around them.
It took a couple of kids to loose some fingers before they decided to put a cage around it, not that it did much to stop kids from sticking their fingers through it.
I remember looking at it as a kid as it swayed back and forth with its luring hum calling out to me to come and play the “stop the blades with your finger” game with it.

The fan that I used to have in my bedroom was 36 inches wide before and this one is 48 inches wide.
The only reason I am putting this fan up is because my brother bought 3 new 52-inch fans with remotes to replace all the ones he had installed in my mother’s house two years ago.
He was going to throw them out but I stopped him and cleaned them up then hung them this weekend in my place.
My parents never used them; they have AC.
My brother likes gadgets and toys for boys so he wanted them.
My parents didn’t care either way but my father got mesmerized with the fact he could turn the lights on by remote and let my brother have his way.
So he ordered me to install the new fans last summer, which I did and brought the new/old ones home to my place.

I must admit they looked really nice and even my mother thought they were snappy.
That night the old people went to bed and after watching the TV my father took the remote and shut off the lights.
Well he tried to.
My father is technologically challenged even with, dare I say it, a remote.
My mother on the other hand, you show her once and she’s off to the races.
My father hit every button on the remote and finally shut the lights off but….he turned the fan on.

The next day my mother phoned me and was telling me how my father lay in bed with the remote making the lights go on and off or the fan spinning front and back in various speeds.
Then she asked me if I could come over and shut the fan off because he couldn't get it to stop and it was to cold in their room so they slept in the guest room.

I lay there in bed looking up at the fan as it spun its five guillotines around in a circle wondering if I should have put up two cables instead of one, Hmmm?
I don’t know how I am going to sleep under this airplane propeller as it’s hovering six feet above me.

After finishing the fan in my room I put another fan in the middle bedroom in case I have guests and it's to hot and the third one had this medieval look about it, wrought iron grey with an oriental amber shade on the bottom so I decided it would look great in living room with the rustic look I have happening in there now.

I took down the chandelier I had in the livingroom and then installed the fan up on the ceiling and I must admit, it gave the room the crown it lacked.
I like sitting in the living room at night sometimes to read a book amongst the jungle of plants I have growing in there.

I took the chandelier and cleaned it up.
It used to be my mother's but she tired of it one day and replaced it with a new one.
I took her old one and ground it down to bear metal then repainted it white and put back the crystal teardrops it used to have danging.
I think it looked better this way, better than that the ugly brass color it was before.
I took it to my bedroom and hung it right there, above the TV as you walk in.
So now I have a chandelier in my bedroom, a fan in my living room and a 52 TV in my dinning room.
Sounds about perfect to me.

Later that night I went into the living room to look at the plants and to stare out the window while I lost myself in some deep thoughts.
I hit the switch to light up my little oasis and I was still standing there in the dark, I looked up at the ceiling to see if the light was on and it was.
The amber shade is so fucken dark it barely shines through and instead reflects it up to the ceiling.
That’s great for ambiance if I am alone with someone and want to be romantic but it really sucks to sit and just watch the world around me.
That’s life I guess, you just can’t have it all.

After getting the fans and chandelier hung I went over to my mother’s and sat for a while talking about what we had to pick up on our shopping trip this week coming.
I have a lot to get.
I am painting the upstairs this weekend and trying to get as much stuff crammed in before my guest arrives in three weeks.
While she’s here I don’t think I will get much done and might leave town for a couple of days.

When it was time for me to go she got up and gave me a container with cookies that my aunt made and told me I could have them because she didn’t like these cookies.
Now people, when someone tells you they don’t like cookies, alarm bells should start ringing but I took them and thanked her instead.

When I got home I tried a cookie and they were fucken great, moist and sweet, fruity with the little bits of fruit I could see and taste.
They looked like chopped up dates or something, cool, I ate about ten of them while watching TV.
Later on that evening I sat by the computer to write a post and read a few blogs and I started blotting.
I get that way sometimes after eating onions or eating pasta and I had spaghetti for lunch so I grabbed some TUMS for the tummy hoping it would help.
My stomach started rumbling and I ran for the washroom barely making it there.
WTF, the pasta wasn’t that bad, a little spicy maybe but it shouldn’t be effecting me like this.
I walked out of the washroom only to stop at the head of the stairs and rush back in, I had no idea what was going on with me.

When I thought it was safe to come downstairs I made my way to the computer and sat there waiting to see if I had to run again.
I picked up the phone and called my mother to tell her I was sick and it might have been the spaghetti we ate for lunch.

She told me she was fine and so was my father.
Hmmmm
She asked me if I ate anything else and I told her no, just some of the cookies my aunt gave her.
She said it was probably them because my aunt chops up stewed prunes and puts them in to make her regular and that’s why she doesn’t like them.
Even one keeps her in the washroom all day.
Great, I ate ten of them.

I remember when cars were big and fans were small.
Now I can’t get my big fucken fan in the trunk of my little shitty car.

Have a nice day

Walker

18 comments:

JYankee said...

having said that...we bought one of those ceiling fans at home depot in the US and installed it in our house here...but now when you go thru the door you cant raise your hand...might get chopped off!

Patti said...

Oh lord I am laughing my butt off at the cookies!!! She should have warned you!

I want a fan with a remote! I love cars with big fins too.

bittersweet me said...

i laughed.

you sound very handy to have around the house, even if you can't handle a few prunes ;)

Blazngfyre said...

Well, wasn't THAT a shitty deal!

Anywhoodle, wanna come to FL and help me re-do my house? I mean ... a few rooms in my house?
I'll even make you cookies that won't keep you residing on the can.
Unless that's what you want/need.

gab said...

Ahh so sorry that you have to "run" all the time. lol My grandson who is 5 came home this weekend with same problem........but Im pretty sure he didnt eat any cookies like yours.
I have a fan in my bedroom with a remote and I love it. I want one for every room now! Ours stays on pretty much 24/7 simply cause that room is hot even with the vents closed. Some nights we have even opened the window a crack because even with the fan on high its hotter than hatties!

Walker said...

JYankee: WoW, how low are your ceilings?
Mine are 9 feet high downstairs and eight feet high upstairs.

Walker said...

Patti: I already have enouggh remotes in the bed with me I down need another one.lol

Yes the cookies done me in for two days but i am better now and got rid of the rest of them to the guys :)

Walker said...

bittersweet me: I don't mind the dried prunes but these stewed ones seen to know my number lol.
I can be handy around the house and I do enjoy fixing things.

Walker said...

Blazngfyre: Sure and can you make special brownies instead of cookies ;)

Walker said...

gab: I amlost have a fan in each room now buit without the remote.
I do like them better than the AC for the money savings and the breeze. Something AC can't offer without freezing you in the process.

Gypsy said...

I thought you were going to say they were those "other" kind of cookies, you know the kind that make you see pink rabbits jumping round the garden.

On the bright side, at least you've cleansed yourself now and you're all shiny and new in your tummy :)

Walker said...

Gypsy: Actually I don;t like those kind of cookies. They tend to knock my body off and I like being in control even when i have a buzz. Its one of the reasons I don't like getting drunk.
Yes I'm not full of it no more LOL

Blazngfyre said...

I most certainly CAN/WOULD/WILL make you "special" brownies! :D

Walker said...

Blazngfyre : You do realize of course that no work will get done after lol

Teresa said...

Yeah, was is it with guys and remotes. I hope you are feeling better today.

Lynilu said...

I love ceiling fans!

I'm sorry (snicker) about the cookies (giggle) and I hope you're better soon! (snort)

Oh I gotta leave before I......

Walker said...

Teresa: I have one remote that turns on everything and thats it.
My brother has so many gadgets he has a pile of them in his car and house.

Walker said...

Lynilu: Ha ha ha funny lady lol
I love ceiling fans to more than AC.