blue moon (2)

Friday, June 29, 2007

I Got Rated ©

HA HA HA!!!!!!!

According to this I am almost a fucken saint.

This rating was determined based on the presence of the following words:
· cock (127x)
· sex (106x)
· pussy (93x)
· fuck (35x)
· clit (29x)
· ass (26x)
· cum (21x)
· suck (20x)
· pain (13x)
· ecstasy (10x)
· hell (9x)
· orgasm (8x)
· kill (6x)
· gun (5x)
· death (4x)
· knife (3x)
· dangerous (2x)
. bitch (1x)

What's a guy got to do to get an “R” rating around here, wear an orange robe and hang out at an airport or something?

Thirty years ago if I said what I say on my blog today, I would have been more than just censored, probably deported to Quebec or something like that.

Times have really been alot of changes in my lifetime so far.

There was a time when the only way you could even see a couple, married or not in bed on movies or on TV was in a split screen format and they were dressed.
Now, HA let's get naked and fuck like wild beasts for all to see and that's just the fucken commercials.
They took "Where's the beef" to new limits.

I was watching the news in Europe a couple of years ago, I don't remember if it was Germany or one of those Norwegian countries but they were showing a male stripper taking it all off to the beat of the music and when he was standing there naked this little old lady in her 70s ran up and gobbled it all up.
I mean she deep throated it right there ON THE NEWS and this was her grand daughter's stag or shower what ever they call it there.
She really likes her snitzel.
On the news here you would never see anything like that, they still beep words like shit, pee, fuck, Celine Dion....

Naked news, not here.
Naked weather ha ha ha, this is Canada are you nuts if your nipples don’t fall off from frostbite they will roast off but I can see what some of the forecasts might be like now that it’s summer.

"It going to be sunny today and very hot, so you might want to get a couple of hats for your heads guys and gals, remember to put a little extra sunscreen on your nipples, you know how sensitive they could be at times, especially if that guy with the little Darth Vader helmet walks by and sees them ripe and perky".

Personally I don't give a shit if they take their clothes off or not.
When I watch the news or weather I watch to see the news or the weather, just move your naked butt to the side because you are not the news.

What I really want to see are the bloopers from those shows.
I can see it some of them now in my head.

The guy is naked pointing to New York telling us the weather there but his cock is up and pointing to Galveston because this chick he is hot for walked by.
Or the blonde with the big tits is pointing to Florida and talking about a hurricane approaching the coast and then she finally gets the joke someone told her out back and wants to explode in laughter but holds back from laughing so much she squirts a little pee out and all of a sudden it's raining in Mexico.

Yes times have changed since I first watched TV or went to the theater.
They took off the cigarette and booze ads and replaced them with drunk driving ads which you can’t see when your pissed and driving, condom ads but can’t find a condom when you fucken need one, sanitary pad ads usually when its to late, Viagra and similar ads that seem to make people dance more than have sex, but they still have BK and McD ads so, "Where's the beef"?
On TV and I'm NC 17 so I better not hear any complaints about my freaking language.

Have a nice Weekend



Anonymous said...

I can't believe you didn't get a XXX rating!!! Haven't these people read your sex posts??? Very funny post as usual Walker. I liked the bit about the blonde weather girl who lets out a little bit of pee and its raining in Mexico...LMAO.


Peter said...

Hey buddy I got the same rating for about 10 words used, one of which was "hurt" like most of these things, no rhyme or reason.

patti_cake said...

Honestly i'm of the "less is more" category. I like a little mystery!

P.S. I am horrified by that Grandma! *giggle*