blue moon (2)

Thursday, March 08, 2007

Penis, Lost and Found ©

Before you get to my post, even though I am not in the Battle of the Blogs I still support the friends that are still in it and if you ‘re of the notion and in the mood to drop them a vote you could do so on the links next to the names below.

Stacy of the Peanut Queens Lair, very nice lady looks great in a bikini to. Vote here.

Brian of An Audience Of One, he might look good in a bikini but I don’t want to see the picture please. Vote here.

Steve of Steve’s Nude Memphis Blog, I don’t think he wears clothes so we’ll just leave the bikini cracks out of this one. Vote Here.

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Its Wednesday, five days after moving Mike and I'm still sore, specifically my leg and back where I landed on the pavement.
It doesn’t hurt as bad as the day after but it’s still a nasty reminder that I don’t bounce as well as I used to when I was younger, it’s more of a THUD and “groan” now.
While I was numbly stilling in my chair Saturday afternoon a friend of mine called to tell me she was in Toronto the weekend before and got me something she found that I have been looking for.
So we set a time when she would come over and I told her I would go out and get us a couple of lobster tails.

While I was out I decided to do a little shopping and pay a bill I still had outstanding.
First I went to a hardware store to pick up a couple of bins to put some more spare computer parts in from the back room.
I have decided to move the computer shop from the backroom to the basement and use that room as a small library for the 900 movies I got clogging my living room and a sunroom to sit and read in.
I have a lot of work this spring in the basement.
I will be building a laundry room and a computer workshop across from my other workshop.
Then I have a deck to build outside and to rebuild the double porch outside and their balconies.
Guess what I will be blogging about in four months?

Anyhow I picked up the tubs and a couple of other odds and ends I needed and then went to Sears to pay the card off.
Some of you may remember when I went and bought some jeans on boxing bay.
After that I went to Di Lorenzo’s and picked up the Lobster Tails before I headed off home.
They get them fresh on Saturdays and only sell them once a week and I swear they have to be 2000 calories each and they weigh a pound apiece.
There are usually line-ups going up and around the aisles.
I umm kinda bought a couple of cannolos too shhhhhhh.
I put them in the fridge and went to watch some TV before my friend got here.

I didn’t have long to wait before the doorbell went off.
I opened the door and there she was standing there with a grin on her face and sticks out her arm holding videotape in her hand.
She said she found a copy in a used bin in one of the shops she went into in Toronto.

A year and a half ago a friend asked to borrow two movies I had just acquired.
Normally I don’t like lending out movies because if they get lost I am the one footing the bill then trying to replace it and as in this case it’s hard to find a copy.
I had just gotten a movie from my friend at the video store called Puppetry Of The Penis.
Normally it wouldn’t be something I would buy if I went from the title but it just so happen that a few weeks earlier I seen it on cable and found it hilarious.
These two Australian guys go in stage and whip out their penises and use them as props in an onstage act.
There is nothing sexual about it other than the organ its self and with all the pulling yanking they do on their tools I don’t think sex would be possible for weeks after a show.
I don’t know if I could go on stage and start playing with my penis to a full house especially if there are a couple of hot chicks sitting in the front row.
I could get away with it in the beginning while they’re playing the national anthem and everyone is standing at attention but it’ll start looking suspicious ten minutes later when everyone is sitting and I’m still saluting the front row.
I could put a little poncho on it and give my penis a name, like ummmm Poncho Pee Pee or El Gringo yeah that sounds better.
STOP ROLLING YOUR EYES!!!!!!!
No not me, I couldn’t do this and I applaud them for putting their fears behind them and sharing with us their childhood amusements.
So if you catch your little boys playing and talking with their penises just think, one day they could be famous and make you proud LOL
If you get the chance watch the show or movie its great.

The other movie was the Vagina Monologues, which I found funny as well.
Now see that’s something I could do without a problem.
I could go on stage and talk about pussy any time.
Yes yes I meant you Emme.
Damn cat’s humping my leg for me to pick her up and put her on the chair next to me.
You’re waiting for me to say how much I like having a pussy rubbing up against my leg aren’t you, well I’m not, so there.
Not so predictable now eh, pthhhhhhhhhhh?

At any rate I was to meet them at the pub and give them the movies but they called and said they couldn’t make it for some reason but I could leave the movies there and they would pick them up the next day.
That was fine, the staff knew us all and I left them there.
That was almost two years ago that I saw the movies.
My friends forgot about the movies and they disappeared.
SEE, that’s why I don’t like lending them out.

So since then I have been trying to replace these two movies and now my friend goes for a trip 400 miles away from home then walks into some seed shop and finds a used copy in a bin that she dishes out the lone dollar they were asking and brings it home to her buddy and is now standing two feet way from me holding it in her tiny hand, butt first displaying the name of the place I bought the fucken movie in the first place with my number tag on it “4595”
THIS WAS MY MOVIE!!!!!!!!!!!
What are the odds of that happening?
A tape goes from here to a city of eight million people 400 miles away and ends up in some small dingy shop in some secluded ally where no one cares to go.
Then a friend of mine just happens to go an a trip to said city only to walk in because something in the window caught her attention and see the tape and BTW was the only thing she bought there.
Then brings it back all the way home from where it started.
I pointed it out to my friend and she couldn't beleive it but I showed her the tag with the address of the store and phone number that was next door.
It only goes to show you that life is strange and it’s a small world.
I am happy to have my movie back and the story that came with it, if I ever say I have a boring life just slap me.
NOW WHO HAS MY VAGINA MONOLOGUES?!


Have a nice day.


Walker

10 comments:

patti_cake said...

Now what are the odds of THAT happening? How were the lobster tails... Mmmm i've been craving some lobster tails. Maybe this week-end!

Lora_3 said...

A video!

Be safe...

Nan said...

Now that's a story. Life is freaky sometimes.

gab said...

Now that was a great story! I wish I could help on the other one. I know we have some strange movies in our collection but alas I dont think that is one!

Stacy The Peanut Queen said...

Hey, I FINALLY get to leave a comment (I snuck away and am blogging on my lap top!!!)

I have GOT to check out that Penis puppet show...that has GOT to be hilarious!

And thanks for giving me a shout out at the top of your blog there...that was SO nice of you!!! ;)

Walker said...

patti_cake: The LObster tails were fantastic :)

I don;t know what the odds of that happening are but I hope I didnt blow my chances of winning the Lotto lol

Walker said...

Lora: Yes A Video, tell me you didn;t think i lost the real thing LOL

Walker said...

nan: some of the best stories are the ones that dcreep up on ypu and say SURPRISE!!!!!

Walker said...

Gab: ah it's ok, I bet it finds its way back to me some day also

Walker said...

Stacy: its a fun show and I know you would love it.
Nice to see you here, IT guys suck. :)