blue moon (2)

Friday, April 07, 2006


GRRRRRRRRRR!!!!!!! Right now could mean a lot of things.
It could mean I am happy, like if someone has her teeth buried in my chest or her nails raking my back.
Now that would make me have a happy growl.
Or if a sexy woman walked in the room and she had this nice tight outfit that just………..

Oh didn’t I mention I growl.
Oh yeah I growl and it’s a deep growl that starts almost as a whisper and grows.
It grows from waaaaay down.
Look up a bit yeah right there in the center of my chest.

When I get hurt I growl.
It’s like diverting the pain and expelling it from my throat.
Like the time my buddy shot me in the back with the shot gun.
I growled to absorb the massive amount of pain I was in and the growl grew to the next level of growl.

That’s the “I am pissed growl”.
That’s when you run; especially when I am holding a semi automatic Remington 1100 wing master series shotgun, fully load.
Or if I walk out of a place and the green hornet; those are the nice men/women who have nothing better to do than hang around parking meters with 1 minute left to give you a fucken parking ticket the second it happens.
I KNOW they have the fucker written before the time runs out.
They just add your plate number and BOOM fifty bucks in the whole and for what!!!!!!!! A $4 bag of milk
At $54 a bag, I want to personally squeeze that cow’s Titties.
Where was I, oh yes GRRRRRRRRRR!!!!!!
Today’s GRRRRRRRR!!!!!!! Is brought to you by Windows XP.

I was sitting here writing this post about my day with teeth, yes I said teeth. I had a whole day that for some reason revolved around teeth.
First there was this friend I ran into downtown. I haven’t seen him in awhile so we sat for a coffee, I had a coke.
I noticed the gap in the front of his mouth and ask him what happened to his teeth.
He didn’t want to say.
I pushed and teased and prodded and he said it was to embarrassing and I would only laugh.
I told him I wouldn’t laugh.
So he tells me a week before on his way to work he was a little late and when he got to the corner his bus was approaching the bus stop so he started to run for it as fast as he could.
As he was getting closer he swerved to get around a group of people he ran into one of those no parking signs that are cemented into the side walk.
He was stopped dead in his tracks…………….
After I got up off the floor and stopped him from leaving he finished the rest of the story.
As he was assessing the damage he noticed his 2 front teeth were shattered and they had to surgically remove the rest.
Apparently he had a bruise in the shape of the post from his groin to his collor bone.
He is getting 2 new ones screwed in.
After that I went to the mall to look for a couple of items. I was beginning to get hungry so I hit the food court.
Now this is an adventure.
I was so hungry I could eat anything but when you get to the food court there is EVERYTHING you want.
Now I don’t know what I want to eat.
There was New York Fries, Wang’s Wok, Sushi House, A&W, Subway, KFC, Kojak souvlaki house, and another dozen or so more.
I was starving and stood there doing a process of elimination to find out where I wanted to eat.
First I eliminated the ones with the big lines.
Then I eliminated what I didn’t want to eat, like sushi. I was hungry so this was about quantity and sushi is not enough.
Then I took what I like the most to eat and made my way down to the least.
I chose Subway, but went to A&W because there was no one in line.
So I walked up to the counter and looked up at the menu.
Now I haven’t been to an A&W in over 20 years.
In fact they were closed here and didn’t reopen again until 10 years ago.
I used to have a great time when I was a teenager at the A&W near my place.
But that’s another story.
Looking up at the menu they had a grandpa burger a papa burger a teen burger and a mama burger and some rug rat burgers to but I never look at that section.
The grandpa burger had 3 patties, 3 big honking patties.
The thing was a skyscraper for fucks sake.
If my father opened his mouth that wide for a bite, his teeth would fall out.
The papa burger had two patties. It looked pretty good and the teen burger was a good size.
The momma burger though, looked like an Oreo cookie with pickles and onions on it.
So after deciding on the burgers I want and onion rings instead of fries I bellied up to the counter to order.
An oriental woman walked up and politely said “can I help you”.
I stood there blinded by the reflecting light of her two BIG stainless steel buck teeth that looked like they belonged on a battle weary Bugs Bunny.
In fact those teeth would make Bugs Proud to own them.
They were fucken huge.
I bet that woman isn’t getting by any airport check out.
Stainless steel teeth go figure.
This woman could probably open cans without any effort or fear of cutting her lips. Those teeth stuck out of her mouth like a saber toothed tiger’s.
Does she brush them or use a Dremel machine and the wire attachment to polish them, barbed wire to floss.
Would have made Jaws from the James Bond movies a perfect mate.
She was a nice lady though and took my order and I was polite as could be I didn’t want to get bit.
Now there is a woman you don’t want biting you during sex.
I can see it now.
There goes one nipple.

I went to a table and took a bite of my papa burger. I wasn’t going to chance the grandpa burger. One bite told me WHY there was no line up. Who would want to eat a scorched piece of leather they called a burger.
Damn sushi was looking good after that first bite and after greasing my face up, I actually found an onion in the onion rings.
The food was absolutely horrible.
Now that I think about it, the only thing I ever like about A&W was the root beer and the sex.
Forcing down the burger and saving the second one for my guest (why waste it right)
I got up and started home.
On the way back I stopped by Archie’s house and as soon as I sat down he throws me the big beaming smile.
I looked at him and told him I don’t do old fat men.
Ducking the lighter he says No I got my new teeth today, I could bite anything now.
Have I got something for you Arch.

Now this is as far as I got in my post when this soft voice in the back of my head said.
Psssssssssst Walker can you feel it?
It’s been building up for awhile and I know I have your attention now.
Can you feel the grip I have on your balls?
I know you can feel the pressure.
Just a little squeeze and you’ll explode all over the place.
So go to the fucken bathroom before you piss on the chair.
And I did

So I’m sorry I don’t have that post for you any more but I will try and think of something else to write.
That accounts for the GRRRRRRRRR!!!!!!!!


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