blue moon (2)

Saturday, November 12, 2005

Walker's Lost News ©

Here we go with another installment of the news in my life and something I saw on the TV today

Going Dutch

Upon receiving my orders last night from my commander and chieftess, Lisa.
I went to bed early so that I could get up and go to the doctor’s office.
I have been having problems with my arm still and now my fingers have gone numb. (Wonders if I told Lisa that hmm)
I woke up early one day and found the cat chewing my hand and didn’t feel a thing.
That was the first sign.
The second sign was I couldn’t grip the mouse.
So I went early to bed, 3 am as opposed to 6 am and woke up at 9 am only to find out that everything is closed until noon, so I got up and went uptown to the ceremonies at the War Memorial.
There were politicians, Vets, Diplomats and People.
It was a somber moment, the silence was deafening.
After that I went to the Doc’s who gave me my flu shot and then checked out my arm.
It seems that when I pulled my arm out of the socket while I was helping my friend I must have torn the muscle that runs from my neck to my shoulder. (Wonders if I told her this too) The way I sleep aggravated it more and viola PAIN!!!!!
So for the next while I have to stretch and doing windmills motions to help it heal and I have to get new pillows too.
Seems that I’ve hugged the stuffing out of mine and my head isn’t sitting properly.
So off pillow shopping I guess.

From Russia Without Love

Hello Mrs. Kaprov, how are you today?
Fine Mr. Stankrow.
Call me Ivan. So have you considered what we discussed the other day?
Yes I have and it is very generous of you, but I want 2000 euros. I have three kids to feed.
2000 sounds reasonable. So how is Natasha?
She is fine and healthy, full of life.
You know this will make my client very happy. His little boy is gravely ill and you sacrifice will bring joy to their house.
I only want everyone to be happy.
Fine then, so we have a deal. We will meet tomorrow and sign the papers.
Da, until tomorrow then.

That conversation up there is one I imagined that may have happened as I wrote it. It’s all speculation on my part. The names are false but the story below is true.
It is in relation to a news story I saw on the Greek news at my fathers place.
Last week the Russian police raided a house and arrested a man and a woman that were in the process of selling and buying a seven year old girl.
The police were tipped off to the deal and where it was happening.

The story goes something like this.
A man was looking to buy a young child, sex was no an issue. The child was going to be harvested for the body parts.
There was someone already for the heart and the rest would have been sold to others.
Where the fuck is this world going?
They had the little girl on the news and she was beautiful and smiling without a care in the world.
Just think they were going to slaughter her like a lamb and take what they needed and saw nothing wrong with this.
Then the mother was saying that she had made a mistake and was distraught about her starving kids and that she wouldn’t have gone through with it, but when the police kicked in the door she was caught handing her over.
Mistake my ass.
Good work on the part on the Russian police and shoot the bitch.
Just think, this one was caught but how many were not.
The mother was fully aware what her daughter’s fate was going to be and accepted it.
How cold could she be….Oh that’s right my EX was Russian, frost bite for sure?

Fridays Jokes
(One day late)

Two Women

Two Women Arriving In HeavenTwo women are new arrivals at the pearly gates and are comparingstories on how they died:
1st woman I froze to death.
2nd woman: How horrible.
1st woman: It wasn't so bad. After I quit shaking from the cold, I began to get warm and sleepy, and finally died a peaceful death.
What about you?
2nd woman: I died of a massive heart attack.
I suspected that my husband was cheating, so I came home early to catch him in the act. But instead, I found him all by himself in the den watching TV.
1st woman: So what happened?
2nd woman: I was so sure there was another woman there somewhere that I started running all over the house looking.
I ran up into the attic and searched, and down into the basement.
Then I went through every closet and checked under all the beds. I kept this up untilI had looked every where, and finally I became so exhausted that I just keeled over with a heart attack and died.
1st woman: Too bad you didn't look in the freezer-- we'd both still be alive.


A very wealthy man was having an affair with an Italian woman for several years.
One night, during one of their rendezvous, she confided in him that she was pregnant.
Not wanting to ruin his reputation or his marriage, he said he would pay her a large sum of money, if she would go to Italy to secretly have the child- if she stayed in Italy to raise the child, he would also provide child support until the child turned 18.

She agreed, but asked how he would know when the baby was born.
To keep it discrete, he told her to simply mail him a post card and write "Spaghetti" on the back. He would then arrange for child support payments to begin.

One day, about 9 months later, he came home to his confused wife.
Honey," she said. "You received a very strange post card today.
"Oh, just give it to me and I'll explain it," he said.
The wife obeyed and watched as her husband read the card, turned white and fainted.






On the card was written: "Spaghetti, Spaghetti, Spaghetti. Two with meatballs, one without."

Food For Thought

Irish Luck

His name was Fleming, and he was a poor Scottish farmer.
One day, while trying to make a living for his family, he heard a cry for help coming from a nearby bog.
He dropped his tools and ran to the bog.
There, mired to his waist in black muck, was a terrified boy, screaming and struggling to free himself.
Farmer Fleming saved the lad from what could have been a slow and terrifying death.
The next day, a fancy carriage pulled up to the Scotsman's sparse surroundings.
An elegantly dressed nobleman stepped out and introduced himself as the father of the boy Farmer Fleming had saved.
"I want to repay you," said the nobleman. "You saved my son's life."
"No, I can't accept payment for what I did," the Scottish farmer replied waving off the offer.
At that moment, the farmer's own son came to the door of the family hovel.
"Is that your son?" the nobleman asked.
"Yes," the farmer replied proudly.
"I'll make you a deal. Let me provide him with the level of education my own son will enjoy. If the lad is anything like his father, he'll no doubt grow to be a man we both will be proud of." And that he did.
Farmer Fleming's son attended the very best schools and in time, graduated from St. Mary's Hospital Medical School in London, and went on to become known throughout the world as the noted Sir Alexander Fleming, the discoverer of Penicillin.
Years afterward, the same nobleman's son who was saved from the bog was stricken with pneumonia.
What saved his life this time?
The name of the nobleman?
Lord Randolph Churchill.
His son's name?
Sir Winston Churchill.Someone once said: What goes around comes around.

Have a nice weekend


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