Once Upon A Year ©

One Monday, last year on this date at 5 am in the morning.
The bells rang shaking up my world forever.
BANG BANG BANG!!!!!!!!
GET THE FUCK UP!!!!!!!!!!

I open the door and the fog was out there still thick as soup.
Standing out there on my porch hair wild to the wind, with steam emanating from her breath stood………
DEB!!!!!!!!!!!
I came early to pick you up,
Here’s some Tim Horton’s coffee.
Its 5 am my flight leaves at 8:30 am.
We don’t want to be late you know?
Besides I wanted to make sure you were awake.
I haven’t slept all night. I’m too excited. I don’t know what she will say, maybe she won’t like me. Did I show her the right picture or the Tom Cruise one?
I think it was mine.
Damn Tom Cruise could be stealing my girl friend as we speak.
You should have gotten some sleep I think you’ve lost it.
God I hope not. She’s planning to screw the shit out of me.
Too much information, too much information.
Yeah, yeah, your virgin ears.
Ok let’s go.
It’s 5:10 am.
We just go and makes sure we are there and we could sit around.

We got to the airport at 5:40 am and tried to look for another T.H. for more coffee. We sat around for an hour before I decided not to tempt fate and go to the passengers section.
I hugged Deb and she told me to have a good time.
I walked up to the metal detectors and was told to pull my laptop out and to empty my pockets of any metal. Then I was to walk through the detector.
These things hate me.

Empty your pockets please sir and step through here please.
Beep (fuck)
Take off watch check pockets again. Step on through
Beep “groan”
Leave jacket off, turn pockets inside out. NOW step through.
Beep
WTF I am practically naked.
Out comes the hand wand, She runs it over my body and it screeches as it gets closer to my crotch.
YUP that’s me Iron Balls Walker.
The wand went past my balls and stopped on my heavy belt buckle.
OK, it was the belt buckle but you all could still call me Iron Balls Walker.
I gathered all my stuff and I head out to the staging area.
I was nervous and tired. I hadn’t slept in over 24 hours.
This was the first time I was going on a plain in 31 years.
Deb is a good friend of mine and woke up at 4:30 am to come and get me. She and her husband are very nice people and true friends.
This was also supposed to be a dry run for her because she was heading off to Vancouver in a couple of weeks.
When the day of her flight came, she woke up and could hear her plane as it was flying off over her house,
At 7:45 am I boarded my flight and strapped myself in for the ride of my life.
This was the farthest I have ever gone in Canada.
I was waiting for this day for months. Being the worrying type I had booked this flight 2 months earlier.
The plane was scheduled to have one stop in Calgary and then off to Vancouver where they promised to land before they threw me off.
This wasn’t the last leg of my trip this was merely the first. I had to also take a bus and 3 ferries before this day was done before this was over.
But those parts are not as important as this part.
This was the biggest and most important of all.
After flying for 8 hours, the plane landed in Vancouver.
There she was, standing at the airport (After she moved from behind the billboard and I saw her) .
One year today is the first time Lisa and I met for real.

........................Happy Anniversary Baby











I love You Dear



Walker