blue moon (2)

Thursday, April 21, 2005

A Trivial Night ©

Well, to say I have a quiet and normal life would be a lie. I live next door to my parents, my brother lives half a block down the street and his computer store in right next door to me on the left side. I’m surrounded by the people I have been trying to escape from for half my life.
My watering hole is 5 blocks away which makes staggering home easy, like last night and the pizza joint is in line with my back door. So you all have the map in your heads now? My mother to the right, brother to the left, pizza in the yard and freedom 5 blocks away, so the evening begins.
It’s 7:30 pm I say goodbye to Sara on the headset and head off to the bar to meet up with my trivia team. Every Tuesday we gather to play trivia and to have a couple of drinks. I’ve been staying home lately and haven’t seen the gang in a while. I had received a phone call earlier telling me everyone would be there and they wanted me to come also so I thought what the hell.
It’s not your average group of people I guess, it consists of 1 General, 1 cop, 2 politicians,
1 accountant,1 micro biologist, 1 computer technician, 1 aircraft mechanic, 3 Revenue Canada execs,1 insurance broker and a university librarian to round off the team.
We sat around playing and sharing answers trying to finish number 1 in North America. We usually do but tonight we spent more time catching up than playing. Around 11 pm I decided to go home, some of the others had already left. As I paid my bill and turned to go the bar maid walked up to me and handed me a beer and said it was from the guys outside. I didn’t need another one, I had 3 pints already and our pints are 20 ounces. I went out and there were 3 of my friends there waiting for me. They asked me to sit and I said only for a bit, I wanted to get home, I’m not into the bar scene that much anymore. It’s full of BS and I’ve been enjoying staying home more. I sat and listened to the gossip of the bar and ladies if you think you gossip you should hear the guys. Who’s fucking who and who got caught fucking who and blah blah blah. Well it started to rain so we left the patio and went inside about midnight. We sat at a table and they ordered a bottle of brandy, Metaxa to be exact.
It’s about this time that a very good looking woman walks in and sits at the bar. The boy’s eyes lit up and started the whispering. I’d love to fuck that says one, me to says the other and the third one whispers, who wouldn’t.
Now this lot can’t remember the last time they got laid. I mean years. So I go, why don’t you go over there and give it a shot? They look at me stunned. Ummm I got to get up early in the morning was one response and the others basically said the same thing. Bull shit I’m thinking, if I got a woman in bed in the morning, the only thing getting up is my dick.
Just go over and say hi and see what happens I tell them. Nope they wouldn’t budge.
You go says one if your so smart. Yeah ok says I I’ll show you chicken shits, how to be social. I walk over and sit with the lady and start talking. They are watching the whole time, giggling like little school girls. I bought her a drink and continued to talk for about 30 minutes and then got up to go, she got up hugged me and kissed me on the lips and I went over to the table.
Man you’re the best says one of them, the other called me a dog.
I swallowed my drink and said good night and headed home I couldn’t stop from laughing on my way home.
They’re going to be hand polishing their dicks until the day they die.

Now here is the conversation I had with the woman.
Hi Fiona
Hi Walker
It’s been awhile, how was China?
It sucked; I couldn’t wait until my contract was up
How about you? Seeing anyone?
Yup I got a girlfriend now. She lives in New Zealand.
Cool .Pretty far though.
Yeah but I’ll be there in December for New Years Eve. Can I buy you a drink?
Sure, beer is good
Any way I got to scoot, the girl friend should be home soon and I want to talk to her before I hit the sack. See you next time.

Now as I’m walking home I can feel the effects of the 6 brandies I had plus the 4 pints. So since I was lined up with my back door I went into the pizza shop for a pie. 1 large combo and there should be some for the next day.
I get home and fire up the laptop and prepare to wait for the girlfriend. I take 1 bite and the phone rings. It’s 1:30am who the fuck is it now. I pick up the phone and my mother is on the other end freaking out, my niece is sick and has to go to the hospital and my brother is no where to be found. Problem is I can’t drive, I’m lucky I didn’t get arrested for impaired walking.
I hunt my brother down and get him to come home and we all head off to the hospital. My niece has a bacterial infection in her ear and throat. She had a fever of 103. We got the kid treated and went home. Its 6 am, the pizza is cold. The GF had left a message on the laptop and a text message on my cell phone, which in my haste I had left at home, and she is probably worried because I always answer my calls.
It’s now 7am and I head off to bed. I curl up in my blankets and slowly fall asleep. 7:30am construction crew starts digging up the street in front of my house. FUCK
This, believe it or not was a quiet day in the life of Walker.

Have a nice day.


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