blue moon (2)

Friday, April 27, 2007

In The Wee Wee Hours ©

WARNING EXTREMLY DRUNK POST!!!!!!!!!

What a day.
It started last night when a friend called up and said he needed me for the next day but he could or wouldn’t tell me why and where we were going.
So it could have been for a coffee or trouble, I didn’t know but I said ok because either way he is a good enough friend where I don’t need to ask.
That’s the way I am with friends, I stand by them and don’t let others make my mind up about them for me, I decide who is my friend.
As I kid I went against my parents about this and am happy about it.

ANYWAYS, I woke up at 7 am and got ready for the mystery day.
I didn’t know if I should wear my battle clothes or a suit so I went with jeans, they just go with every occasion.

I walked over to Archie’s place and he was waiting for me.
A taxi was there waiting and I got in and I asked him what was up and all he said was that I will find out soon.
We ended up at the casino.
That’s why he wouldn’t tell me because he KNEW I wouldn’t go to the casino.
When we walked in I was surprised to see hundreds of people there.
Fuck, don’t these people have something better to do than have their money taken away from them.

Archie finds this slot machine next to this little old lady and sits down and feeds it a hundred dollar bill.
Fifteen minutes he gave it another hundred.
He sent me to get us some booze, 11 am and I was freakin drinking.
It wasn’t long before another hundred-dollar bill slide up the slot.
The little old lady next to Archie hit the jackpot and got $1500, well that set Arch off on a rant that would have started a fire if he had been out in the forest.
After getting her money she got up and sat on the other side of Archie and started playing that machine.
He put another hundred in the machine, that’s $400 so far and we have only been there thirty minutes.
The little old lady keeps hammering away on the new machine for about fifteen minute when she hits another jackpot for $1600.
I stepped back from Archie because I knew what was coming and it came in a flood.
He has a way with cursing and he is not quiet about it.
People stood there shocked in disbelief that someone could actually say what he was saying.
He played for about another five minutes and said he had to go home to get more money and wanted me to sit there guarding his slot machine.
This was great, I have been a bouncer for years and have backed people up in fight and NOW I was relegated to guarding and fucken slot machine.
Archie was adamant about it, he didn’t want the little old lady sitting at it and winning HIS jackpot to.
He gave me another beer and I sat at the fucken thing until he got back which was forty minutes; that was a forty-dollar taxi fare BTW.

He sat at the machine and it gave him a hundred bucks, a drop of what he poured into it.Then bells started ringing and he looked between the slot machines to see who won and it was the little old lady again.
He just went berserk this time and was spitting at his machine and calling various religious figures some really nasty names.
He got so mad he got up and we left after he lost $1200 in 3 hours and that was with the taxi time to go and come back from home.
We decided to go to St. Hubert’s, which is a BBQ chicken and rib joint and he was so drunk he came out wit 6 large boxes of food that cost $65.
When we got to his place it was fair to say, I was obliterated because of drinking on an empty stomach.
He opened the boxes and I ended up with a whole chicken and a side of ribs.
I normally wouldn’t eat half of that but I was hungry and drunk.
Before you could say burp it was all gone including a pound of coleslaw and two slices of bread.
It didn’t help much because I was still betting dizzier but the minute.
The worse part was I had to go out in a couple of hours with some friends to watch the hockey game.
I knew I was screwed before I left his place and wobbled all the way home.

When I got home I decided to call Monica to wish her a happy birthday on the phone but instead of calling her I ended up talk to Sheryl from Texas.
Sounded like a nice lady and she thought I had a sexy voice, her husband wanted to know whom the hell she was talking to.
She thanked me for the birthday wishes and asked if I could call back in July when it was her birthday.
I tried once more and told Monica’s mother Happy Birthday well I guess that was close enough because she wasn’t home anyway and I did have to go meet people.
I got into my team colours on and headed off to meet a couple and then walk to the pub where the rest were waiting.
We had a great time but I did drink another 8 beers, that’s 20 ounce pints for the record about 14 bottled beers.
NOW I am totally pissed and I had to walk these people home because they were tipsy after 3 beers each.
I just walked in between both of them and they kept me upright as the each leaned on me from either side.
After depositing them home I managed to get home myself as a light drizzle started coming down.
Now I am sitting here writing you this post and listening to music while the world is spinning out of control.

Have you ever sat back and wondered what a songwriter was thinking when he wrote a particular song.
Sometimes I sit here spaced out thinking and listening to the lyrics wondering what was he or she thinking when they wrote the song.
Were they happy, sad, stoned or just feeling a little goofy and having fun?

I sit there and look for a hidden message in the lyrics just incase they are trying to tell us a secret.
Remember when they used to have rumors about playing Black Sabbath albums backwards to hear satanic messages.
Well I did that and the only thing I heard was the same gibberish like I hear from politicians today which is nothing understandable.

So I decided to have some fun and to pick a song on Baby Blue (My IPOD) and take the lyrics then see if I could figure out what they are thinking or subliminally trying to tell us while they wrote this song.
I chose one of my favorites “Wee Wee Hours” by Chuck Berry.
Here is one of the first wild men of rock n roll so i decided to try and pick his mind.
The original lyrics are in red.


In the wee, wee hours
Right after the bar closes.
That's when I think of you
I’m drunk and horny.
In the wee, wee hours
I can’t go home to the wife like this.
That's when I think of you
That blonde with the big tits was hot.
You say, but yet I wonder
She said she wanted to jump my bones.
If your love was ever true
She just needs $200 to pay the rent

In a wee little room
Man is it late.
I sit alone and think of you
She said she would be here after I gave her the money.
In a wee little room
I paid for the motel room.
I sit alone and think of you
It’s been two hours and she is still not here.
I wonder if you still remember
The bitch must have fucked off.
All the things we used to do
She told me she was going to fuck me for a long time

One little song
I’m sitting here singing the blues
For a fading memory
I think she slipped me the Mickey.
One little song
Oh Baby Baby, my head spinning
For a fading memory
Why did I trust you and leave you alone?
Of the one I really love
How could I do this to you when I knew I should have stayed by your side?
The only one for me
She up and stole my car.

So that was my day until now pretty much and tomorrow I have to wake up early to do alot of running around.
At least there will be no beer involved.

This will be my weekend post and just spend my weekend reading your blogs and relaxing for a change.
Well except for Saturday when I have that Birthday party to go to and then the people coming over to watch game 2 and brunch on Sunday..................

Have a nice weekend

Walker

13 comments:

Angel Without Wings said...

Considering how smashed you were when you wrote this, I didn't even detect a slur in your words. Well done. It reminded me a lot of my life in my mid to late 20's. Its a miracle I am here to tell the tale. Great post Walker, I really enjoyed it.

Angel Without Wings said...

Considering how smashed you were when you wrote this, I didn't even detect a slur in your words. Well done. It reminded me a lot of my life in my mid to late 20's. Its a miracle I am here to tell the tale. Great post Walker, I really enjoyed it.

Angel Without Wings said...

Its ok you're not seeing double, I accidentally published twice. I'm not trying to mess with your head, honest....

patti_cake said...

You did a really good job drunk blogging Walker! I cannot fathom spending that kind of money in a casino. I hated the one casino i've ever been in!

Peter said...

Well you got drunk and probably hung over... so did Archie AND he's down $1200 too.

Shaz said...

Thats funny archie just loves those things doesnt he?
I wonder if he did the nexy day.

Hows your head now? lol

Good job honey

P M Prescott said...

coming by way of Brian's blog. Love your background picture. Little Old Lady made out like a bandit didn't she? I wonder if she was working for the joint to keep suckers plunking their money down.

Walker said...

Angel Without Wings : Sure sure just trying to mske me dizzier than I was LOL
I think alot of us today wonder how we survived our youth I know I do

Walker said...

Patti_Cake: I couldn;t either or even concider doing that. I love my money to much to let it go that easy

Walker said...

Peter: Archie was born drunk I think as for the money I don;t understand how he does it and sleeps at night.

Walker said...

Shaz: Yes Archie is a compulsive everything I think. Everything he does he does it like its his last day on earth and loves it until the next day and is looking for money

Walker said...

P M Prescott : She was having way to much fun to be there working for the casino LOL
Thanks for stopping by

Bingo Lady said...

haha good for the old lady. us old timers can show you a thing or two about playing internet casino slot machines.