Brain Farts ©

Guy walked into the pizzeria the other day and up to the counter.
The cook recognized him immediately as a regular.
Hi, can I have a small combination please but can you cut it into four pieces instead of eight. I’m not that hungry today.
Sure no problem.

This happened last week at Pizza Hut where my friend is manager.
The guy actually believed the customer that he would be eating less pizza if the same pizza were cut into fewer pieces.
Just so you know who is making your food.

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Excuse me can I have a beer please.
If you are going to have more than one, may I suggest buying a jug?
You get more for your money.
I think this sounds cool.
I look at the menu and see a jug is 16 dollars for 60 ounces and a glass with 20 ounces is $4.95.
Umm nix the jug and get me a glass.
Makes you wonder how many they had before they wrote up this menu.

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I walk up to the door of the bank and went to push my way in only to find the door closed.
It’s in the middle of the week and it’s not a busy bank so I figure maybe they all went to the washroom at the same time.
Who knows, maybe the manager is hopping a teller in the loans department.
I pace around outside for about ten minutes and then peek inside the bank.
I can see the teller now so I figure she would be coming over to open the door soon.
Two minutes go by and still nothing.
Just then a little old lady excuses herself past me and PULLS the door open.
DUH
Pull

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CRASH!!!!!!!!

I run to the other room.
Snake, WTF was that loud noise?
The window fell out and to the street.
I look out the now gapping hole in the side of the building and there is a crowd of people around the shattered window.
It’s a good thing there was no one down there when it landed.
What happened Snake?
I don’t know.
I was walking away and then heard thus loud noise.
And you didn’t touch it?
NO, but I took this flag someone stuck in the side of it out and threw it in the garbage.
I walked over to the garbage and took out a piece of wood with a paper tapped to it that said

DO NOT REMOVE

We better go Snake.

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OK THE GLOVES ARE OFF.

It seems that I am a pushover for batting eyes and a sucker for a bet with a woman.
HA!
WHO'S A FOREIGN CHICKEN?
Not me.
Uh Uh
And there is no way I am going to be sucked into another bet.
Nope, nada
NOT GOING TO HAPPEN…………………
No woman is sucking me into another bet again……….EVER!!!

OK I got the Arizona Cardinals over the San Fran 49’ers.

I DON’T WANT TO HEAR IT
LA LA LA LA ………..

Done in by again.

That’s it from now on no more you have to glue you eyes open when you talk to me.

The loser has to write about either:
A) His favorite person in Texas, specifically Monica.
OR
B) Her favorite person in Canada specifically one out of 35 million.

I have one person to choose as opposed to 35 million, hmmm.

Somehow I think I'm getting screwed again.

I got to get a manager.

Have a nice day

Walker